Stress! Stress! Stress!
by Ninnik Nishukan
Summary: DISCONTINUED.
1. UST

**Stress! Stress! Stress!**  
Ninnik Nishukan

* * *

**Summary:** This is how frustration smells. Drakken/Shego. Set somewhere between _Larry's Birthday_ and _Graduation,_ and obviously goes AU or whatever you'd call it. **Warning: Contains highly detailed acts of a sexual nature. **

* * *

He was having really bad luck. 

It started on Monday morning when he slipped on a dropped bar of soap and fell in the shower— one of the biggest domestic killers. What a humiliating way _that_ had would have been to die for an evil villain!

And it was only getting worse and worse and worse.

Monday evening, he had another shameful defeat at the hands of Team Possible. And this time her sidekick even filmed the entire thing for some silly school project. Those snot-nosed teenagers at their school were probably having a good laugh at his expense. And later, when he and Shego ordered out for dinner because their kitchen had been blown up by Kim Possible, Drakken got some bad king prawns in his order and spent the rest of the evening bent over a toilet bowl.

He sent half a dozen robots over to the take-out place to force feed them bad sea food— see how _they'd_ like it—but Possible's little wiz kid Wade-something happened to be ordering Chinese right then and alerted Kim Possible.

Typical. That boy needed to eat less, Drakken thought bitterly.

* * *

**Tuesday**

* * *

His henchmen went on strike to get higher salaries, safer working conditions and a new dartboard for the break room, marching back and forth in front of his desk while holding home made signs with badly written slogans. He gave them a dartboard, hoping that would shut them up for a while. 

In the middle of dinner, telemarketers started bothering him and Shego.

By the end of the day, a total of six different telemarketers from six different companies had called them.

* * *

**Wednesday**

* * *

His mother came for a surprise visit. Shego had a grand ol' time teasing him through all of the questionable excuses he had to make to his mother about anything that could point to what they were really doing at the lair instead of hosting a radio show. 

In the evening, his henchmen threatened him, saying they would form a union if they didn't get a few of their demands granted. Reminding them of the fact that he'd already generously donated them a new dartboard just yesterday didn't seem to help at all. Those ingrates!

Four more telemarketers called, spread throughout the day. While Drakken hadn't been paying attention, his mother answered one of them and ended up ordering a dozen Christmas bird feeders— "for the poor little birdies when it got cold"— apparently completely forgetting they were in the Caribbean.

* * *

**Thursday**

* * *

Thursday was a _particularly_ bad day. 

He bumped into Dementor when he was out grocery shopping with Shego. Dementor not only mocked him for his defeat that Monday— the nerve; as if Dementor himself hadn't recently had his own plans thwarted by Kim Possible as well— but also snatched the last one left of his favourite chocolate bars in the store right in front of his nose.

That would have been tolerable if Dementor's stupid brother-in-law hadn't also taken the last pint of low fat cherry-grape-blueberry-pine seed frozen yoghurt, Shego's favourite flavour, which they only sold in this one store in the area. A vicious fight broke out, and they barely avoided getting arrested.

And when he got home, he noticed that some kid had put gum in his hair, probably while he'd been looking for that blasted chocolate bar. He spent an excruciating fifteen minutes trying to peel it off without pulling his hair out, but only made it stick to her fingers and get messier.

In the end, Shego got so tired of all the noise he was making that she simply cut the lock of hair off! Cut it off! Just like that! He certainly gave_ her_ the lecture of her life! And she accused him of being as hung up on his hair as his Cousin Eddie!

Her!_She_ said that! Her, who spent practically half her salary on hair care products! Hah!

Two more telemarketers called them up after that— when the third call came, Shego promptly melted the phone with her plasma before he could even pick it up. That only served to make him even angrier, and he docked her pay to replace the phone.

They had another big argument, during which Shego claimed to only have done it so they could have some peace and quiet and he would stop stressing out, saying it was bad for him. Yeah, right. She was only thinking of herself as usual.

* * *

**Friday**

* * *

Drakken decided to get rid of a lot of the old doomsday devices from failed global domination plans of the past. They were only cluttering up his many lairs, and as he had no use for them anymore, he figured he could cash in on them by selling them to the highest bidder. He needed more money; especially if his henchmen were going to keep rubbing their two brain cells together and rebelling. 

He'd already asked Shego if he could lend him some money to finance his next plan, and he'd even promised her a double refund when he became the ruler of the world, but she'd only told him that it would be like throwing a hot dog to a pack of starving Rottweilers and expect to get it back whole…whatever _that_ meant.

Of course he wasn't going to hand over working doomsday devices to other people, though; he was going to sell them for parts. A lot of them were halfway destroyed by a certain band of annoying teenagers, anyway.

Tallying up all the things he'd built over the years and which had been unsuccessful wasn't exactly the most uplifting of jobs. He didn't even dare to consider how much time and money he'd spent on it all, or he'd surely fall into a permanent funk. And having Shego stroll behind him as he inspected everything, shaking her head and rolling her eyes, didn't make it any less frustrating.

He had no idea whom to offer his wares to, however, because it would be too embarrassing to sell them to people like Killigan, Monkey Fist…and certainly Dementor, so he called up a certain gentleman by the name of Big Daddy Brotherson. He hadn't seen him since the year before, and talking to him now was already too soon. Drakken loathed the man and his passwords and silly games. Unfortunately, Brotherson knew a lot of people; he had a lot of contacts, and was Drakken's best bet for finding a buyer.

After spending an infuriating forty-five minutes of back and forth on the phone with Brotherson, Drakken finally managed to convince him to help out. Brotherson reminded Drakken of Shego in a way; he had enough money already, and seemed to be driven simply by a desire to amuse himself and irritate others. It was maddening.

Later that day, people started calling incessantly. And it wasn't only the telemarketers this time, either. First, it was his mother asking him a thousand questions about what he was going to do with his life and whether he was planning to stay a bachelor forever. Then it was his former cell mate, Frugal Lucre, pestering Drakken about coming out to visit him— and then some brat kept making prank calls to him, asking for people who didn't exist! And Shego kept snickering at him because he'd fallen for it, too!

When the next person called, Drakken had had enough.

"Look!"He bellowed into the phone, "I don't know any Amanda Huggenkiss— very funny, by the way, ha ha ha, oh _how_ I laughed--- I don't know any Oliver Clothesoff, no Seymour Butz and no Ivana Tinkle!"

"_**Whoa! Chill out, 'Cuz! Seriously! It's only me, Motor Ed! Seriously!"**_

"Oh."_Great_, Drakken thought, _more family members. _"Well, what do you want?"

"_**I just wanted to talk to Green, dude! Seriously!"**_

"Green? Oh, you mean Shego. Uh, sure, whatever," Drakken mumbled, handing the phone piece to Shego, who was hovering curiously by his side. "It's for you."He said, glad to not have to deal with Eddie right then. "But be quick about it, I'm waiting for a call!"

Shego raised her eyebrows at him in a bored-looking kind of way. "Jeez,_more_ people calling? Well, aren't _we_ Mr. Popular…!"

"Nnnnhh!"

"Go have some herbal tea or something, okay, Doc?" Shaking her head, Shego patted Drakken's shoulder in a dismissive, placating manner, smirking at him. He'd been stressed out all week, but he'd _really_ worked himself up these past two days.

Drakken scowled. "I'll be calm enough when you get off the phone!"

Sighing, Shego glanced at him before turning her attention to whomever it was who was calling her. "Yeah, hello?"

"_**Green?"**_

"Ugh—_Motor Ed_?"

"_**That's me, seriously!" **_The villainous mechanic said cheerfully._** "Look, I was wondering if you'd wanna come down to the next NASCAR event with me tomorrow!"**_

Shego pretended to consider his offer. "Uh, how can I put this in a delicate kind of way? How about…NO!"

"_**Awww, Green, you're breaking my heart, seriously!"**_

"My name is_ not_ 'Green', Eddie."Shego muttered tightly.

"_**How about we go do something else? I have this awesome new ride I'm dyin' for you to see! Seriously!"**_

Shego's face wrinkled with disgust. "Um, did you not just _hear_ what I said? N-O, _no_!"

Drakken rubbed the bridge of his nose as he listened to the conversation. He gnashed his teeth as, for some reason, the memory of Eddie and Shego ditching him in prison many months ago resurfaced in his mind. He'd almost managed to repress that by now…

Eddie just wouldn't let up._** "Come on! I'll pick you up and everything! I'll come pick you up right now if you want! Seriously!"**_

Shego grimaced in frustration; of course she _could_ simply hang up on him, but she wanted him to understand once and for all so he'd never bug her again. "Argh! Why do you keep trying? Didn't you take the hint the first time?"

"_**But Green—"**_

Shego almost gasped when Drakken suddenly stepped forward with a snarl, snatching the receiver out of her hand.

"Hey!"She yelped, staring at him.

"Listen, Eddie!"He shouted. "Her name is _Shego_, not Green, and she does _not_ want to date you! I know you're family and all, but stop bothering her! Because you're annoying me as well, and I'm too busy right now to be annoyed anymore! She does NOT want to date you or meet you or _anything_!"

"_**Dude! You're way out of line here! I wanna talk to the lady, not you! Seriously!"**_

Drakken snorted; his own Cousin had left him in jail, and he had the nerve to talk about being 'out of line'? "This is _my_ lair, and if I want to hang up the phone, I will! So goodbye! See you at the next family picnic! And, and— and stop saying 'seriously' all the time!"

"_**Hey, seriously, that is not cool—"**_

Drakken slammed the receiver down, huffing.

"Good grief."He mumbled, rubbing his forehead.

Shego stared at him for a few seconds more before she spoke. When she did, her voice was impatient. "Uh, _why_ did you just do that?"

Drakken waved her away, grunting vaguely. "I'm waiting for an important call, Shego! I can't have you holding up the line."

"Ahem, we have _two_ phone lines?"Shego reminded him pointedly.

Drakken finally looked up at her, blinking. "…oh."

"Yeah."

"Right."

Shego shook her head in exasperation. "So you just chewed out your own Cousin for nothing. I bet you'll really get to hear it at the…um, next family picnic."

Drakken groaned loudly. "Oh, for the love of— nnnhhaannhh!"

Shego cocked her hip and crossed her arms over her chest, looking peeved. "You shouldn't have done that."

Drakken hesitated as he saw her expression and knew that she wasn't referring to whatever social awkwardness he'd created for himself within his own family. "Well, what does it matter, anyway? It's not as if you were going to actually _date_ him, was it?"There was a timbre of uncertainty threading through the anger now.

She halted a little at the strange look in his eyes, as if he wasn't completely indifferent about whom she dated. Brushing it off as nothing, she went on, raising her voice with irritation. "No, but that's not the point! I can handle my own business!"

"Hey!" He objected. "I thought— I thought I was helping, all right?"

"I don't _need_ any help!"Shego snapped.

"Oh, thanks a lot for the gratitude!"Drakken barked back in acid tones. "It really warms my heart!"

"Nobody forced you to 'help' me."She scoffed, tossing her hair. "I didn't ask you to."

"Well, next time I'll remember not to try to be _nice_."His tone was sour and offended.

"Yeah, right."Shego dismissed, unimpressed. "You just wanted me to get off the phone!"

"Yes, well— that, too!"He admitted reluctantly, but quickly rallied. "But I thought I was doing you a favor by getting my thick-headed Cousin off your back!"

"Oh, knock it off!" Her eyes narrowed; she was getting sick of him trying to play this unappreciated gentleman routine. "You were being selfish and butting in. Admit it!"

Drakken's eyes narrowed as well when he met her gaze, his lips pursing with indignation. "Well, fine! That's just… that's fine!"He said defiantly, and for some reason, he sounded slightly…off, like he was trying to make his voice sound tough, but wasn't quite succeeding. "If you want to date Eddie, go ahead! Here! I'll even dial him up for you!"

Shego's eyes widened as she dived after him and slammed the receiver down again. "Are you_ mental_ or do you just not _want_ to listen?"She asked hotly, glaring closely at him as she clutched his hand on the phone to keep him from acting stupid. "I _said_ I'm never gonna date him!"

Drakken sucked in a breath, shooting her a disbelieving scowl. "And yet you objected when I told him to—"

"Ugh, you're so stubborn!"Shego's breath left her in a heavy, exasperated puff of air.

"That's rich, coming from you!"Drakken retorted immediately.

Pausing, she regarded his face, which had done slightly red with all the yelling, and as she looked at him, she decided to end the pointless argument. She didn't know why he would get so worked up about her and his lame Cousin, but there it was, and he wasn't just mildly annoyed— in which case she would've had some fun with teasing him if she hadn't been feeling so annoyed and confused herself— he was upset, and she just wanted him to calm down. "Listen, I do NOT want to date Eddie, okay?"She told him intently, wondering why it was suddenly so important to reassure him of that. "I just wanted to deal with him myself." Again, she paused, looking into his wide, dark eyes. "Okay?"

To her surprise, Drakken let go of the phone slowly, panting slightly before he straightened his back. "All right."

Shego tilted her head at him, her hand on his arm; she noticed it was trembling. "Seriously, what's wrong with you, Dr. D?"She asked, and her voice was slightly softer than usual. "You seem really high strung."

Drakken groaned. "Just…_don't_ say 'seriously'."

Shego barely managed to bite back a smirk at that.

"I'll be in my study waiting for that phone call."Drakken mumbled. "Keep the henchmen away from the phones."

Shego found herself looking after him in concern even after he'd left the room. Shrugging it off, she went to get herself something to eat.

* * *

**Saturday**

* * *

Brotherson had eventually called Dr. D up that Friday, so they went to The Bermuda Triangle on Saturday. After a whole evening of Big Daddy's 'silly games', from which they'd even turned up empty-handed, Drakken looked so furiously frustrated that Shego wasn't sure if he might cry or break something or spontaneously combust on the spot or what. 

Their hover craft breaking down when they were still an hour from their lair and were forced to walk the rest of the way home was the last straw. It was a balmy, bug-infested night, and sweaty and swatting at insects, Drakken ranted and raved on as he walked beside Shego home. Except it wasn't even ranting. He was so mad he wasn't even using words anymore, it was just strangled, stuttering grunts and yells.

Sometimes he'd almost make it through a sentence, but it would quickly get interrupted by a frustrated shout, and she couldn't make out what in the world he'd meant to say. Occasionally he'd kick at a car or a mail box as they went past them.

Normally, Shego would have been annoyed and would have found some opportunity to leave until he'd cooled down, but now…to tell the truth, she was getting honestly worried. She'd seen him angry before, and she'd even seen him unable to form words, but she'd never seen him quite like this.

It usually passed after a couple of minutes, but now it had been more than an hour, and he was still going at it. In short, he seemed even more nuts than usual, and she was worried about where it might lead him. He might do something even stupider than usual.

When they finally made it to the lair, she jumped in shock when he spun around with a snarl, driving his hand through the wall. Actually_ through_ the wall.

Letting an exasperated sigh out, she watched him pull his hand out again, basically unscathed, and she thanked him silently for having chosen the cheap plaster walls of the kitchen to let out his anger on, so she wouldn't have to deal with him whining over hurting his own hand as well.

For a moment, as she watched him panting and grimacing, her brow furrowed worriedly, and she felt like patting his arm or something in an attempt to calm him down, but it looked like he might only try to bite her hand off if she did.

He turned to her, obviously needing something else to focus his temper on now that he'd let the wall have it. "We would've had the deal if you hadn't— we were _so_ close, Shego!"

Oh, so now he had the ability to speak again? "The guy grabbed my ass, Dr. D!"She reminded him incredulously. "How did you _expect_ me to react?"

He gave an overbearing sigh. "You could've just told him to stop it instead of throwing him across the room, couldn't you?"

"Whatever." Shego muttered, turning away a little from him as she suddenly felt insulted. "_You_ try having your behind felt up by a sleazy stranger and see how much _you_ like it."

Drakken scowled deeply at her. "Big Daddy Brotherson _did_ try to feel me up, unless you didn't notice, and I didn't complain!"

Shego snorted, disbelieving laughter choking in her throat. "_What_?"

"Ugh! That came out all wrong!"He grunted, mildly embarrassed. "You know I didn't mean it like that! I meant, I wasn't about to wring the guy's neck when he held the information we needed! I was trying to look at the bigger picture!"

"Yeah, sure, but first you'd have to let him look at _your _bigger pict—"

"Very funny! I didn't let him get away with it, but unlike somebody else I know, I just stepped away from him instead of going all Cave Woman!"He lectured her sternly. "Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it."

Shego only smirked, unaffected. "Yeah, just lie back and think of England."

His expression became puzzled. "What?"

"Nothing," she said, chuckling.

"Stop laughing, Shego! And stop that _mocking_!"

"You sure you weren't just _enjoying_—"

"I said_ zip_ it!"

Rolling her eyes, she mimed zipping up her lip with her thumb and index finger.

"Now come on! We still have work to do!"He ordered, dragging her along by her wrist towards the elevator.

"But it's the weekend!"Shego objected as she stumbled along after him. "You already made me work today! I get the rest of the night and Sunday off!"

He stopped abruptly, and she almost walked right into him. "No, you don't!"He told her as he spun around. "You have to work overtime to make up for ruining our important meeting tonight!"

Shego snapped for air; right, let's blame the sidekick, wasn't that nice? "Hey! That wasn't my fault! I told you, that guy—"

"Shego! I'm warning you!"Drakken said as he pointed a quivering, reprimanding finger at her. "I am in a _very_ foul mood!"

"Wow,_ really_?"She shot back dryly.

She was sure she could actually _hear _his already strained patience snapping like a thin twig in his brain then.

"NnngghhhAAAARRGGHH!"

Shego quickly took a step back. "Whoa! Okay, okay, don't burst a seam, Dr. D! I'll work tonight, okay? But _not_ tomorrow," she added quickly, sending him a stern look.

"That all depends…depends on how much work we get done tonight."He warned her, breathing hard. "We have to do some preparations for Monday, remember? The museum?"

"We'll get it _done_, Doc."Shego said firmly. "I am _not_ working tomorrow."

"Hmmphh!"He scowled at her as he pressed the elevator button, trying to catch his breath. There was a loud 'ding!' before the doors opened. Drakken shuddered. "I _hate_ that sound."

Shego rolled her eyes. Right now, she was sure he'd also hate the sound of a babbling brook, bird song or even a refreshing breeze._ Everything_ seemed to annoy him, for some reason. _Everything_.

As they got into the elevator, the door shut and Drakken pressed the button for their floor, Shego's thoughts strayed to a subject that had her a bit worried despite herself.

There had to be a reason why he was so aggressive lately, what if— what if he was holding something back—

Something odd had happened earlier that evening.

For the first time since DNAmy, she'd witnessed a female person noticing Drakken because she'd simply found him attractive.

* * *

Before they'd been going to see Brotherson, Drakken had noticed that his shoelace was untied and had bent down to tie it. As Shego had stood waiting by the bar, she'd caught the eye of a slightly inebriated-looking blonde in a slinky, black cocktail number. 

"Boy, now that's what I'd call an ass, huh?"The blonde had said, grinning appreciatively.

It had taken Shego a second or two to realize that the woman had actually been referring to Dr. D. Puzzled, Shego had followed her gaze and had seen that there could have been no mistake. Drakken had been the only guy standing there.

"Dr. D?"She'd asked slowly, as if the woman had been a mental patient. "Seriously?" Okay, sure, so the Doc had been looking a little sharper than usual in his black, pinstriped suit with the white dress shirt and the nice, dark red tie, obviously bought for the occasion so he didn't have to get hassled by the bouncers again, but _really_— it was _Drakken_! It was just Drakken!

"Is he with you?"The woman had asked, looking hopeful.

Shego had sent her an odd look, as if she'd just sprouted a cherry tree out of her forehead. "Yeah, don't _think_ so."

The woman had brightened at that. "Really? Hmmm, I'd consider taking a shot at him myself then."

"Umm..." Okay, _that_ had been an unexpected turn...! For some reason, this had caused Shego's frame to stiffen, her fingers flexing tightly. For some reason, the thought of having this pretty woman go over to Dr. D and— it had made her feel a bit ill. The woman had looked a little older than her, too, closer to Dr. D's age than Shego herself, with something seasoned, worldly and relaxed about her, like she'd be difficult to rile up. She didn't seem like she'd be easy to mock. Glancing down, Shego had also taken note of the fact that the woman's breasts had been considerably larger than her own, and it had caused a hot and cold burst of petty, irrational anger to bloom in her stomach.

"And the blue skin doesn't turn you off?"She'd demanded sceptically.

"Oh, I know he's a villain, I've seen him on TV, though the camera didn't do him justice. He looks much better in person."The blonde shrugged. "Meh, being a villain just adds a certain element of danger to him, you know? Besides," she added, with a sly grin, "you're not exactly one to comment on somebody's skin colour, are ya, Minty?"

"Watch it, Blondie." Shego'd growled at that.

The woman had sent her a languid, disarming smile. "Just saying."

Shego had had to stop herself as she'd realized she'd been shifting her weight anxiously from foot to foot. Surely the Doc wouldn't know what to do with the attention of an attractive woman, though, she'd told herself, surely he wouldn't even have understood that she'd been trying to pick him up, surely he'd just brush her obliviously aside, telling her that he was here on business—

That thought had made Shego feel a little better. Wait— wait, wait,_ wait_—_better_?

"Too bad he's gay."The woman had suddenly said, then, distracting her.

Shego's eyes had practically popped right out of her skull when she'd heard that. "_Excuse_ me?"

"You know, if he's not with you, and he's standing there in his spiffy little suit with his hot little behind and he's going up to Big Daddy, well..."The woman had gestured at Drakken, who'd been inspecting his teeth in a mirror on the wall, adjusting his tie. Shego had blinked; this information about Big Daddy's sexual orientation had been news to her. By the looks of it, though, it would've also been news to this woman if Shego had told her that Big Daddy wasn't just a night club owner. There were plenty of reasons why people went up to see Brotherson, but this woman clearly hadn't been let in on that little secret.

"Yeah, Dr. D is gay."

It had dawned on Shego that the voice saying that sentence had been her own. Once again, her eyes had widened with incomprehension. Why in the world would she be telling this woman that?

The woman had pouted. "The good ones always are."

As Shego had walked up to join Dr. D, it was as if an iron claw had just released its grip on her chest. She'd felt as if she'd just averted a disaster with her blatant lie, but she hadn't even known why it would've been such a disaster for Dr. D to have a gorgeous woman flirting with him.

If he ever found out what she'd done, she was sure he'd be angry with her. After all, it wasn't often that he got a chance like that, not only because he spent so much time in his lab, but because he was a blue-skinned super villain with awkward social skills.

Then again, if what that woman had said about Dr. D had been correct, he might've not cared at all...

* * *

Shego glanced at her employer in the elevator, biting her lip. It had just never occurred to her before, because she'd never really gotten that vibe from him. She'd just assumed he was one of those eternal bachelors who were married to their job. 

But now...

Well, he'd always been a little unorthodox, and he did tend to be a bit giddy and overly sensitive...

Was this why he'd never tried to hit on her as long as they'd known each other?

Somehow, that prospect actually made her feel a bit...troubled, even if she shouldn't care less about his personal life; especially not that part of it. What he was or wasn't in that aspect had absolutely no bearing on her and her life. It didn't matter. Not at all.

So why did she need to know?

"Dr. D, uh, you're not…I mean, you're not _really_ gay, are you?"She asked him tentatively.

Drakken eyes bugged out as his face snapped around to stare at Shego. Then his eyes narrowed. Great! That was _all_ his _wonderful_ week had been missing! His lippy sidekick calling his sexual orientation into question! Yes! How fun! Shego thought he was gay! That just made him feel so _very_ manly! Marvelous!

In Drakken's opinion, he couldn't care less if somebody was gay or straight or whatever— people were people no matter what, and he'd end up ruling them all one day regardless of what or who they were— but even he felt that when a heterosexual man was asked by an attractive woman whether he was gay or not, it wasn't exactly something that the man would consider a compliment. It wasn't exactly something that would make a guy feel particularly masculine.

"GAHHHH! NO!"He yelled, and Shego winced at just how loud his voice was there in the enclosed space; it was no wonder villains always had lairs with such high ceilings. "You _intolerable_ woman! NO!"

"Okay! Okay!"She said hastily, putting her hands up. "I believe you! Yeesh!"

He was too busy getting angry over the question to even notice the thinly veiled seriousness she'd unintentionally put behind it.

As the elevator stopped, Shego sighed.

Somehow, she _did _believe him.

Dr. D had always been pretty bad at lying. Even if he'd tried to deny it, she'd have figured it out if he was telling the truth or not.

It hadn't felt or sounded like he'd been lying. She knew him well enough to be able to tell.

The reason why she felt so relieved about it was eluding her, though, but the fact that she _was_ indeed feeling so relieved over it was enough to leave her seriously disturbed. Unbidden, her eyes travelled downwards, and it was with great horror that it dawned on her that she was actually checking out Drakken's ass. He was always wearing that long lab coat, and she'd seldom actually—

It took all her willpower not to slap herself in the face right there and then. It was all that blond woman's fault. She'd planted wrong, unhealthy thoughts in her mind. Wrong, wrong, wrong...

Drakken frowned at the elevator door. Why wasn't it opening? They were on their floor, so why?

Grumbling, he looked at Shego. "Shego, press the button for the door!"He could've easily done it himself, but he was still in a rotten mood and felt like ordering somebody around.

"Huh?" Shego blinked up at him. She seemed miles away; it looked like she hadn't even noticed their current problem.

"The door's not opening!"He barked impatiently. "Try pressing the button!"

"Fine," she muttered, feeling a spark of irritation ignite within her, wondering when he was going to stop being so foul-tempered.

She pushed the button.

Nothing happened.

She pushed it again.

"What did you do _now_?"He demanded gruffly.

"I didn't do anything!"She blurted defensively. "I just pressed the button, like you said! I didn't do anything!"

"Well, you must've done _something_!"He insisted.

"If you hadn't had this stupid elevator installed, we wouldn't even be here!"She accused, getting mad at being blamed for something that wasn't her fault. "What did we need it for? We already had one elevator, and those stupid little hover bike things! It must've cost a fortune!"

He sighed, running a hand through his hair in a frustrated kind of way. "The henchmen complained!"

"Since when do you care?"She challenged.

"They threatened to start a union."He muttered reluctantly.

Her eyes were full of disbelief. "…you're_ kidding_."

"No!"

"Those _boneheads_?"

"Yes!"

"Hahahahah!"

"It's not funny!"He bellowed.

"Yes, it is!"Shego laughed. "We're stuck here in our Sunday best because your lazy, stupid henchmen threatened to form a union! You should've just told them to go—"

"Oh, how hilarious!"Drakken sneered. "Why don't _you_ try being the boss once, see how funny it is!"

"I would've just threatened to fire them unless they stopped complaining." Shego retorted carelessly. "You know those goons, they're like sheep, they're easy to scare. And I bet you hired cheap labor to install this elevator, too, right? That's why we're stuck here."

"Right! Let's all make fun of Dr. Drakken! He's such a big dork! Can't do anything right! It's all his fault! It's _always_ all his fault!"He growled, towering over her. "If you wanted me to hire better labor, you could've paid for it yourself!"

Suddenly she became much more conscious of exactly how big and tall he was, especially compared to herself. Like Dementor, who seemed to try to compensate for his short stature with an unusually loud voice, Drakken spent quite some time, with his lairs and his laughter, trying to make himself look bigger and badder. This of course often had the opposite effect, making him seem smaller (at least in her opinion), so that it was sometimes easy to forget that he wasn't physically a small man. Especially not when he was actually standing up straight instead of exercising his creepy villain stoop.

Looking up at his furious eyes, his bared teeth, quivering shoulders and menacing scowl, she had to admit that while he could be ridiculous at times, he did _look _like a real villain.

"Yeesh, you need to calm down, Doc!"Shego told him, tugging at his sleeve.

"Oh,_ I_ need to calm down, do I?"Drakken spat sarcastically, pushing her hand away."That's really rich, coming from _you_! You're not exactly Susan Serenity yourself!"

"_I'm_ not the one bouncing off the walls right now! You're practically foaming like a rabid dog!" She exclaimed, exasperated.

"Oh, shut up!"

"What're you trying to do? Have a heart attack? Seriously, look at you, you need to calm down!"She insisted, a worried note creeping into her voice. His face was more red than blue now, his broad chest heaving with laborious breaths, his tightly bunched fists trembling.

Drakken hesitated for a second when he noticed that her face bore a look he'd only seen on her maybe once or twice before in all the years she'd known her; it was actual _concern_, and it was in fact concern for _him_. Stumbling mentally, he drew a deep breath, not knowing how to respond, but then abrupt anger coursed through him once more as another thought occurred to him.

She'd been mocking him all week, only adding to his mental stress! And _now_ she was suddenly Miss Sympathy 2007? How _dare_ she! What right had she to look like that? After all she'd done! It was too late now, he decided, she should've empathized sooner, when he'd really needed it! His terrible week might've been almost tolerable if he'd had some support from her, but she'd only mocked and mocked and _mocked_—

"STOP telling me to CALM DOWN!"He roared, and she backed away only to find that there was nowhere left to back away to.

She let out an explosive sigh. "What is _wrong_ with you lately? Gah, it's like you need to_ get__ laid_ or something!"

"Get la— oh, that is just _so_ like you!" He hissed."Always saying inappropriate things, just for a _laugh_!"

"Does it _look_ like I'm laughing?"She asked tightly, her gaze hardening. "It's not funny from where I'm standing! It looks like it's true!"

He bristled. "It's _not_!"

"Yeah, right!"Shego scoffed. "I obviously hit a nerve there!"

"Oh, yeah?" Drakken took a step forward, although he noticed in a distracted manner that they were running out of room in the tiny, square space.

"Yeah!" Shego noticed herself drifting slowly closer to him, but the thought was buried somewhere deep beneath the heat of the moment.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Ye—"

Shego's answer was swallowed up as she was pushed against the elevator wall, and had Drakken's lips suddenly pressing against her own.

* * *

_TBC._

**Author's note:** Yes, it's a cliffie. The next chapter has sex in it. Don't read it if you don't like that kinda thing.

I have no beta on this story. Nitpick away.

**Low fat cherry-grape-blueberry-pine seed frozen yoghurt:** Yes, this flavour does exist. They have it at my local grocery store. It's deeee-lish.

**Prank calls:** Those fake names are obviously stolen from Bart's prank calls to Moe in _The Simpsons_.

_**Lie back and think of England**_: The phrase _**Lie back and think of England**_ is an expression used in the United Kingdom. Traditionally, it was advice given to a woman about having sexual intercourse with her husband. The phrase became popular some decades before the sexual revolution. The assumption was that women were not expected to view sex as pleasurable; instead, women were to view sex as a duty, performed essentially through passive availability.

Since women weren't expected to participate in sex in any meaningful way, or derive any special pleasure from sex, it would not be incongruous to think of something other than sex during sexual acts. Thinking of the continuity of the Empire, through conception and child-rearing, might even make the sexual act more pleasant. The phrase can be used broadly as encouragement for either gender to do something unpalatable.

* * *


	2. Resolved?

**Stress! Stress! Stress!**  
Ninnik Nishukan

* * *

**Summary:** This is how frustration smells. Drakken/Shego. Set somewhere between _Larry's Birthday_ and _Graduation, _and obviously goes AU or whatever you call it.** Warning: DO NOT READ! Contains highly detailed acts of a sexual nature! ****BOO!**

* * *

_What the...! _

Shego made a muffled sound of objection, sucking in a small gasp before she relaxed slightly, breathing through her nose as she wondered how in the world he'd gone from looking like he wanted to throw her off a bridge or something to kissing her like that. Just as she was contemplating pushing him away, however, he cupped her cheek and tilted his head, his mouth opening against hers and pushing her own mouth open...warm, wet softness putting a tingling pressure on her lips.

_Oohhh, that's__** good, **_she thought,_ let's keep doing __**that**..._

Drakken swallowed as he tried to calm down enough to not kiss her too intrusively. He'd worked himself up to such an angered frenzy and had practically attacked her lips with his, as if wanting to punish her somehow, but now that he'd actually taken that drastic step, it was as if the rage had just gone 'poof' like some ninja covering his escape with a smoke bomb; there one second and gone the next. It left him merely feeling sort of dizzy after all the yelling and the intense outpouring of emotion.

Her mouth against his conveyed her confusion clearly to him. She was resisting him a little, but she wasn't pushing him away, either, and the small, uncertain noise that left her, vibrating gently against his lips, made the grudge he'd held over her this week go 'poof', too, as he began to think that maybe she _had_ been worried for him, but had simply gone about showing her concern in a completely incomprehensible and frustrating Shego kind of way…

Moaning, Shego forgot what she was supposed to do and instead pulled him closer, opening her mouth further and letting the tip of her tongue meet his. _Okay,_ she thought, a voice that sounded suspiciously like her own laughing at her in her head, _okay,_ _so maybe I __**did**__ care if Dr. D was straight or not... _

His tongue was hot and wet and tasted faintly like the Shirley Temple he'd knocked back at the night club before they'd gone up to see Brotherson (a choice of drink that had only further added to her worries about his sexual preferences), and her breath caught in her throat when, instead of him being shocked and lost and maybe slobbering as she initiated the French kiss, like she'd halfway expected, he hugged her tighter against his chest and gently rolled his tongue to match her movements. Holding back a whimper, she clutched at his jacket with one hand, the fingers of the other hand finding the smooth locks of his ponytail and weaving themselves into it.

Drakken made an elated sound in his throat as she accepted him, and kissed her back with vigour. He'd done it on a complete impulse, not knowing what had come over him; only that it was something he'd needed. He'd needed her to shut up and he'd needed himself to shut up and he'd needed some kind of anchor that would keep him from letting the rage take him completely and make him tear up the lair or something. And he'd realized that the way in which he'd wanted to solve both these problems was with her mouth against his, stemming the poisonous flow of words, and with his arms occupied by holding her. For a split second, as her body had stiffened in protest to his advances, he'd been terrified of maybe having made the biggest mistake of his life, but now...now it seemed like he might not have to regret this...

He hadn't kissed anybody in years, and it was truly a heady sensation. Of course, it hadn't been quite as long since he'd _been_ kissed— curiously enough, it had been Shego then as well, during the whole troublesome Moodulator incident. Her lips weren't entirely unfamiliar to him; like the last time, they were warm and plump and slightly bitter, yet flowery with the same black lipstick that she'd been using then— a flavor he'd never forget— but unlike the last time, they weren't as insistent or hard or frantic. They didn't need to be, because he wasn't resisting this time, and she wasn't on some bizarre, love-struck high.

As the kiss became more and more involved and she felt him begin to grow hard against her hip, Shego became very, very aware of the fact that she was wearing a skirt; that meant easy access. Of all days to wear a skirt! On top of that, she wasn't even wearing any pantyhose, only panties. The hot weather simply hadn't allowed for it.

She almost jumped, clutching his arm, when he slid a hand slowly up her skirt to stroke her thigh, as if he'd read her mind or something. She hadn't expected that, either. Her knees quivered a little as his hands roamed her skin, her abdomen suddenly warm, and as a faint but insistent throbbing started up between her legs, she was all at once grateful, relieved and disappointed at the fact that his fingers weren't straying anywhere more intimate yet.

Right then, the simple fact that she could feel his erection through his pants, getting increasingly rigid and hot with each second as they touched and kissed, and even more the fact that he was shifting his stance a little and letting it poke into the front of her skirt instead against her hip, bumping lightly against some very sensitive spots, was enough to make her shiver and clench her inner muscles, the crotch of her panties dampening. It was almost too much how he kept doing things to her that she might've expected from somebody else but somehow not him.

And he didn't seem embarrassed— why wasn't he embarrassed? She felt almost intimidated by how...how _not-shy_ he seemed to be about grinding against her, even if they were separated by barriers of clothing. Or maybe he just wasn't troubling himself with fretting about it...or maybe he was just overwhelmed by it all and was simply doing whatever his body was instructing him to do. Maybe that was what she should be doing, too...

Drakken's fingers trembled a little as he ran them up her thigh to her hip and down again, thrusting his pelvis tentatively into hers and groaning softly when she pushed her hips forward in answer, relieved again at her acceptance. Her skin was so smooth and soft...why hadn't he touched her sooner? Why hadn't he ever touched her like this before now? _Oh, right,_ he thought as cynicism briefly reared its ugly head, _because she's your employee, she's disrespectful and aloof and loves to make life difficult for you in so many little ways..._

Although even he had to admit that her company was one of the things in his life that he treasured the most.

As she began to pull his restrictive dress jacket off of his back, he let her, helping her until it was dropped on the floor behind them with a soft thump.

_Oh, great,_ Shego thought absentmindedly as she realized she'd actually started undressing him, _I'm caught in a living cliché, fooling around with my own boss in a malfunctioning office elevator..._

He buried his face in her neck, inhaling before he started kissing her there, and soon, she felt his hand reaching up to fondle her breast through her top and bra, stroking his thumb across her nipple. She had to stifle a gasp; _whoa_— again he was much bolder than she would've imagined!

Just as he was beginning to enjoy touching her warm, supple breast, some annoying, more rational part of Drakken's mind was starting to figure out what his actual intentions with her were turning into, and proceeded to throw befuddled protests like 'What? _Here_? NOW? With _Shego_?' at him. Unfortunately— or fortunately, depending on how you looked at it— his body and the rest of his brain were having nothing of it, shutting down that part of his brain with a resounding 'Yes, NOW! You've neglected our needs for far too long! It's not like she's trying to stop you!'

Relaxing somewhat, Drakken sighed into the skin of Shego's neck, tasting her experimentally with an open-mouthed kiss; like his own, her skin had gone somewhat damp with perspiration because of the hot weather, but he didn't care. She only tasted a bit salty. He'd never noticed before, but the side of her neck, just below her ear, had a small cluster of moles, so tiny, tiny they almost looked like freckles. He kissed them all, counting them with his mouth and getting to four...

His fingers tightened briefly on her breast as she bumped her crotch playfully against his.

Nudging at his head with her nose, Shego eventually managed to wrestle them into a kiss again, and decided she didn't care how this situation looked. This man wasn't just her employer, he was her...her Dr. D. He wasn't just her boss. And this wasn't really an office; it was a secret lair, where they both lived. Together. And spent much more time together than what was probably healthy for an employer and employee.

Apparently, this was the results of that, and...whaddaya know, it felt...pretty good...

Drakken was sure he was being very forward, but there was just a certain urgency to the situation, an eagerness he couldn't rein in. Every touch felt like it was melting away the stress of the week.

So far, he hadn't been met with any objections, which was one of the reasons why he was getting bolder and bolder. She was letting him do these things to her and with her that he'd never thought he'd ever be doing to her, or with her. She was not only welcoming his advances, but was advancing herself, and her enthusiasm mirroring his made his body bubble with the kind of confidence he'd never really had in abundance when it came to these sorts of things.

Shivering, her hand travelled down towards his crotch, a warm surge in her abdomen as her fingers met with his hard, warm length, straining against the fabric of his pants as if begging her to free it. She felt him twitch a little and move his weight around slightly, as if nervous. Shifting against his body, she captured his lips as she squeezed him, stroking him with her thumb, feeling his skin move over his stiffness through his clothes and feeling him moan into her mouth.

This only made her grab his neck and kiss him deeper, her tongue demanding access to his mouth again and gaining it, her breast rubbing into his hand as she kneaded his length.

Drakken's eyes widened; he hadn't expected her to go do that, and her touching him there directly was something completely different than simply grinding up against her. His nostrils flaring, a bit more of his self-control diminished as he grew harder in her hand. Suddenly, he needed to get rid of his pants. Now.

Before Shego knew it, she was helping him open his belt, unbuttoning the pants button and pulling down his zipper. He grunted in relief as the pressure on his trapped erection was removed, and she felt that grunt all the way down her back, trembling as her insides contracted in anticipation. Taking off his jacket was one thing, that was still in the realm of safety, but starting on his pants was a different matter entirely. It looked like they were really getting down to business.

Her fingers twitched with lustful ardour as she reached down to touch him again, too curious to be hesitant this time. Sliding him into her palm, she hummed appreciatively at how much better she could feel every detail now, through this last, thin layer of fabric. She could feel every vein, the shape of him more clearly, and he was warmer than before against her fingers. Panting softly, she wondered what he would look like; he had to be blue all over, right?

As she started fondling him through his underwear, his breath came faster, and he began pulling her top off, settling for just pushing the clingy material up past her breasts, leaving it bunched there as he looked down and caught sight of her bra straining against her skin as she arched her back slightly as if inviting him to touch. It was black lace, and as he reached out to touch her, he absentmindedly remembered that he'd flipped through one of the many fashion magazines she left lying about the lair once, reading some sort of article about feeling more luxurious when you dressed up for fancy outings if you also put on your best underwear.

He'd thought it very silly at the time, and one of the more incomprehensible things about women— because who was going to see your underwear when you went out, anyway, he'd wondered, unless you were some kind of exhibitionist or something— but now he didn't mind so much. The twin mounds of pale, green-tinted skin looked even more appealing against the dark, curly lace, he thought as he petted her through the silky fabric.

The one thing he _did_ mind, however, was that he wasn't quite sure how to get it off. He hadn't had many opportunities to do this in his lifetime, and now he hadn't done it in longer than he cared to remember...

There were supposed to be some kinds of latches on the back, he knew, but he couldn't find them as he felt around behind her, and he was getting nervous and impatient.

Shego watched him fumble and squelched a chuckle; he didn't know she was wearing a bra that opened in the front, and was really starting to get worked up. Finally taking pity on him after satisfying her own need for amusement, she reached down and loosened the two tiny hooks which separated the two cups.

"Oh, right..." She heard him mumble before he wasted no time in pushing the cups aside, exposing her skin.

Despite herself, Shego found herself hunching her shoulders a little, suddenly self-aware. She knew she had great breasts, it wasn't that, but being nude in front of Drakken was a lot more nerve-wracking than she'd thought it might be— not that she'd thought about it!

Swallowing, she busied herself with pulling off his tie and unbuttoning his dress shirt, running her hands across his broad, firm chest, which she discovered was practically hairless, smooth and warm to the touch...but then she was distracted by Drakken gawking at her.

"What?"She asked impatiently.

"They're...they're _green_!" He blurted finally, staring at her nipples, which were embarrassingly taut with arousal.

She shifted a little. "Yeah, _so_?"She demanded harshly, smacking his chest."You're _blue_!"

But Drakken was utterly undeterred by her temper. "I _love_ them," he declared in a passionate rumble, quickly closing in on her skin. Shego gasped when she felt her left nipple become engulfed in warm wetness; a whimper left her, her back arching when his tongue probed experimentally at her before there was an unexpected surge of pleasure as he sucked at her hard.

Drakken's mouth watered and his eyes closed as his tongue roamed across the velvety, pliable skin of her breast, his lips continuously capturing the hard little nub of her nipple, peaking up stubbornly on the soft mound of flesh. She tasted so— and she felt so— she smelled so— he needed more, he though somewhat incoherently as he groaned, revelling in her.

Shego's thoughts were also going along those same lines; grunting, she began to wiggle out of her panties, needing to be touched more, and in other places. She'd gotten them as far as her knees when he picked her up and placed her bottom on the hand rail of the elevator, her back leaning against the wall as he eagerly peeled the panties rest of the way off, brushing his fingers against her curly-haired, dewy outer lips, making her twitch and sigh softly, her thighs trembling.

Drakken pushed at his own pants, shoving them off of his hips and letting them drop to his ankles. However, now that he was only standing there in his boxer shorts and an open dress shirt in front of the woman who liked to pick on him on a daily basis, he couldn't help but to hesitate a little. What if she'd make a crack about size or shape or colour or whatever— he hadn't been naked in front of a woman for a long, long time, and he wasn't sure if he could recover from it if she _did_ tease him.

Finally, he set his jaw with determination; he wasn't a coward, and getting the chance to do this was worth the possible risk of humiliation. What did he care, anyway, he was used to being humiliated— but then this wouldn't just be any kind of humiliation, it would be the very _worst_ kind of humiliation; intimate, personal, private— and...and he was going to risk it. Besides, what could she say? He was seeing _her_ naked as well, wasn't he? Her panties were already off!

Feeling as if he would never go through with this if he didn't act right away, Drakken grabbed her hand without hesitation, curling her fingers around the elastic waistband of his stripy boxer shorts. As their gazes locked for a second, she immediately got the point, pulling his underwear down.

Again, Drakken grunted as his cock was liberated from all restraints, the muscles of his legs flexing a little as she reached out and gripped him firmly, massaging the head with her thumb. Gritting his teeth, Drakken looked down, closing his eyes, and leaned his forearm against the wall as she touched him; it'd been too long.

Shego's heart thudded as she held his heavy, rigid, warm cock in her hand, stroking the smooth, smooth surface, his foreskin moving softly over the delicious hardness and the moist, satiny glans as she pumped him, fascinated by how he seemed to go an even deeper shade of blue as more blood flowed into it with her attentions. She hadn't expected him to be so forward and quick, and she certainly hadn't expected him to just lift her up like that and make her pull his underwear off. It looked like he intended to go all the way with this.

But then, she found that she felt unexpectedly okay with that becoming a part of her very immediate future. _More_ than okay, she thought, squeezing him. And it seemed that her body agreed, too, because as Drakken touched her folds, his fingers slipping gently between them, her body opened up so easily, swollen, wet-slick and ready, that his breath became ragged with his discovery, and he leaned forward to kiss her hungrily as he rubbed her slippery button, his fingers skating over her canal every so often.

Shego met his enthusiastic mouth, appreciating the fact that even with him being this eager, he still took the time to make sure she was prepared. She stiffened and moaned as he slid two fingers into her, his thumb circling and stroking her clit.

Drakken rubbed himself with erratic, anxious movements against her inner thigh as he worked on her with his fingers, almost wincing every time the head of him accidentally and sometimes not-so-accidentally brushed against her invitingly swollen, saturated vaginal lips. Her full, willing mouth against his made his head swim with warmth, but the scorching, lovingly constrictive wetness that was waiting for him and currently squeezing his probing fingers made his body hum with anticipation and unspent energy. Now, soon, it had to be now, or he'd...it had to be now.

The kiss was long, insistent and deep, and combined with the very intimate massage his fingers were giving her, it kept her lightheaded and distracted...and that was why it came as somewhat of a surprise to Shego when he aimed his cock at her opening and began push to inside her, even though he'd bumped against her a few times, murmuring softly into her mouth in warning and gently prying her hand away from him.

Shego sucked in a sharp breath, her eyes going big and round. She hadn't been sexually active at all this year, and the intrusion came as a shock to her system. A very _welcome _shock, but a shock nonetheless. She muffled a keening moan in his shoulder, pushing her hips forward to meet his, biting her lip to keep from screaming when he cleared the distance with a hard, fast thrust, her body moulding itself around him, stretching and accommodating.

Drakken let out a strangled gasp when he was buried to the hilt in her, the hot, snug, wet fit holding him in ways a hand never could. Gritting his teeth, he trembled and leaned his face on her shoulder as he let his hips go into motion. _Moving_ inside of her was even more overwhelming, the friction burning him with white-hot pleasure.

He hadn't felt these kinds of things in _years_, not since long before he'd ever even _met_ Shego, and the memories, already almost lost in his overactive, creative mind, paled completely in comparison to the now.

Abruptly, staring at her face, he stopped his movements as sudden thought crossed his mind. "Uh— Shego—"

"What?"She moaned, making a little complaint of a noise as the lovely friction ceased.

He didn't want to ask, he didn't want to ruin the mood, but he _had_ to. "Are you...protected against pregn— um, you know?"

She looked at him, incredulous. "Little late to be asking me about _that_, isn't it?"

He grinned sheepishly. "I just figured since you weren't stopping me—"

"Of _course_ I'm protected, doofus." She scolded him mildly, pulling at his ear a little. "I'm not _stupid_." Shego had been on the pill for the last few years, following that good old proverb 'better safe than sorry'— because the words 'pregnant' and 'villainess' clearly didn't go together well— and she was glad she'd thought ahead. The situation in which she found herself right then was certainly a prime example of the fact that you really couldn't predict the future and that it _was_ better to be safe than sorry.

He was about to yell a comeback at her when it dawned on him just what kind of situation he was in. There were _other _ways to shut her up. Briefly, a snippet of his usual evil villain laugh rolled in his throat as he smirked wickedly; he caught Shego looking at him with apprehension just before he drew back and slammed into her forcefully, making her yelp and moan, then whimper and clench her muscles as he did it again and again, stronger, harder and faster than what he'd been doing earlier. There was no other word for what he was doing to her now than _fucking_ her, relentless and fevered, her body sucking him in and releasing him as he filled her up over and over, shaking her and the hand rail that she was sitting on.

"Fuck," she hissed, biting slightly into his shoulder as he squeezed her breast, holding onto her bottom with his other hand, and he couldn't have agreed more.

There was one thing, though...

"The h-hand rail sounds like...it, it might break," he panted against her hair.

"No, it won't, no, it won't, no, it won't," She chanted insistently, locking her legs around his waist and drawing him further in, her heels digging into his bottom. "Oohhh, no, it _definitely_ won't!"She moaned as he picked up the pace again, shoving into her harder and faster. Whimpering, she pounded the back of her head slightly against the wall, almost as if to be distracted from too much pleasure.

"Sh-Shego," He stuttered as he felt his body begin to falter. He wasn't going to last much longer.

She must've picked up on the nervous note in his voice, because she suddenly pulled him closer, and drew his head down towards her breasts. Breathing heavily, he sucked her nipple into his mouth, suckling at her for all he was worth as he pounded into her even harder, getting desperate now.

Shego gasped and shuddered as his hips were angled so that his pubic bone pushed against her clit and the black, coarse trail of belly hair raked roughly over her sensitive nerve endings again and again with each of his thrusts. "J-just like that," She told him unsteadily, willing him not to do anything different. "_Exactly_ like that...!" She didn't know if he'd done it on purpose or if he'd just been lucky, but whatever it was, he had to keep doing it. She was _so_ close...

"Okay," Drakken promised hoarsely, nodding, trying to concentrate.

She was _so_ close, and her body tightened almost nervously as she began thinking about how she'd lose control. She wanted it, she needed it, but at the same time, she was in slight trepidation about how she'd look to him as she shook and yelled in his arms, she who was usually so laidback, so careless and unaffected— would he be reminding himself of that moment where she'd let the pleasure overcome her completely, wild and sweaty, the next time she'd act all blasé and sarcastic?

But then again...if she had anything to say about it, she'd see him and hear him as well, when he reached his destination, so he couldn't really use it against her, could he? Frowning, Shego pulled him closer yet and kissed the top of his head, savouring the feel of his mouth on her breast, his naked skin on hers and his cock deep within her.

_What's wrong with me?_ She wondered dimly, twitching and moaning with sensory overload. She wasn't supposed to be worrying about those sorts of things right then, how she might look to him later if he managed to make her— Drakken giving her an orgasm should be a _good_ thing by this point!

It was just so incredibly...dumb to start thinking about the consequences _now_, when they'd already started doing this and were almost nearing the end—a small gasp of a laugh escaped her as he squeezed her buttocks reflexively, the smooth pace of his pounding skipping like a record as he lost control for a heart-beat or two, his voice rumbling nonsensically against her chest, his blunt teeth scraping across her nipple— and when it felt so very, very good.

Who was she even kidding— she wasn't regretting this— and who cared about maybe being a little embarrassed afterwards? She was a big girl, she could handle it! If he tried to use it against her, she'd mock him back, anyway— he'd never best her in that field.

Clutching and stroking his back, she clamped down on him, increasing the resistance of her body so he would have to work a little harder, but at the same time making it better for them, bringing her walls closer around his girth.

Drakken gulped down a mouthful of air and got the appealing scent of her skin in the bargain. He couldn't believe just how...well, sexy she was when doing this. She knew what she wanted and she wasn't afraid to ask for it or to take it, and he loved that. He'd been afraid she might tease him in this situation, too, but she'd proved him wrong. He loved being guided; it spared him the embarrassment of uncertainty, and the hard task of having to resort to guesswork. It seemed she didn't mind being guided, either; in fact, it had seemed to intrigue her.

He tongued her breast, his breath falling heavier on her skin, his hips working her over determinedly, plunging him into her hard and fast; he felt fiercely motivated to make her feel as good as him, he needed her to, but the only problem was that he wasn't sure how long he'd last. It'd been far too long since the last time, and it was all just a little overwhelming.

"Yes, yes, _yes_," she purred in a breathy voice, "Come on, Dr. D, come on, _come on_...yes...!"

And if she kept moaning his name like that, she'd only make it that much more difficult for him.

"Nnngh," he groaned against her breast, shaking slightly as he tried to hold on for just a little longer.

Suddenly, like a revelation, there was something almost like a sob in her moans, and his heart jumped in his chest.

"Come on," she gasped, thrusting her hips forward. "_Now_! I need to— nownow_now_, _please_...!"

That was too much for him, too much of a shock; Shego basically never told him please for _anything_, not unless it was sarcastic. A growl rumbling at the back of his throat, he slammed himself wildly into her as far as he could manage to go, crashing against her cervix once, twice, three times, four times, five— he heard her keening loudly and dimly realized that he was biting down on her nipple— felt her muscles clamp down on him again, hard, hard, hard, felt her insides tremble around him, and he groaned out loud, his body flushing hot and cold at the same time.

Shego let out an explosive breath and sucked it in again, her lips trembling, brow furrowing and eyelids twitching, and she was whimpering as her body tightened and spasmed, pressing her nose and her brow against his temple, not sure if the sweat she felt was his or her own, and not caring. She felt like she was shivering from the inside out even as she felt warm, too warm, and she let out a gasping little yell as hot liquid flooded her in shuddering waves, drenching him. She felt like she was melting; tiny, multi-coloured spots dancing in front of her eyes...

Whimpering himself now, as he heard her breathe her release with a hoarse, quivering voice into his ear, Drakken pushed into her one last time, slower this time, and shaking, before his body couldn't handle it anymore and he went rigid, grunting and gripping her arms tightly as his release took him and he erupted into her in sporadic, uneven spurts, his hips and shoulders twitching, his face hot and sweaty and jaw slack, heart-beat thundering.

As she began to recover from her orgasm, Shego felt his breath warming the moist skin of her neck, and almost as if by instinct, she drew his head closer, embracing his neck and leaning her own dizzy head on the top of his as if it had a kind of anchoring effect, burying her nose in his soft, somewhat damp hair, feeling him still shivering a little.

"Mmm..."She sighed, feeling herself relax gradually. That had been...quite exhausting in so many ways.

After a while, Drakken lifted his head to look at her, and his eyes went a little wide with what he saw. She was smiling faintly, her eyelids low and her gaze hazy, and she actually looked...pleased with what he'd done. Like she was actually satisfied with him, for once.

"Um...Shego..."He began, lifting his hand to stroke her cheek, but withdrawing it, suddenly shy despite the fact that he was still buried inside her.

"Dr. D, I'm..."She cleared her throat, picking a little at his rumpled dress shirt, her cheeks turning faintly red. "This was...uh..."

They froze, staring into each others' eyes as there was a sudden loud, ominous creak, as of metal breaking. Drakken barely had time to snatch Shego into his arms and stumble backwards, almost tripping over his own pants, which were bunched down at his ankles, as the hand rail finally collapsed.

When the racket ceased, Shego made a delicate cough. "Wow, um, kinda glad _that_ didn't happen sooner."

"See? I_ told_ you."Drakken said matter-of-factly, with a somewhat triumphant undertone.

She grinned. "But aren't you glad I didn't listen?"

Now it was his turn to clear his throat before he carefully, with an awkward look on his face, pulled out of her, setting her down on her feet on the floor. Shego's gaze darted down to his crotch, where she caught a glimpse of his softening erection—and she saw that it was glistening with their combined juices; a thought which made her feel a little strange— before he quickly tucked it back into his underwear and pants, looking embarrassed.

She, too, discovered that she was feeling a little unnerved in front of him now, and began fumbling with her own clothing, refastening her bra, pulling down her top over her chest and stomach and covering her thighs with her skirt again. She saw him glancing at her as she was smoothing down her hair, and risked meeting his eyes.

"So, um...we should see if...the elevator doors are working again."He said as he buttoned the last button of his shirt, trying to sound nonchalant and failing badly.

"Yeah..."She mumbled; the thought of not being able to leave the cramped space after what had happened between them was making the roof of her mouth feel dry.

Rolling his shoulders briefly as if his back was a little stiff, Drakken reached out to press the button for the doors. Nothing happened. Drakken swallowed. Shego bit her lip.

A rush of unfamiliar claustrophobia welling up in him, Drakken stabbed at the button repeatedly, glancing back at Shego with a look of increasing despair. Her eyes were wide and she was clutching her own arm tightly in alarm, and he got the feeling that she was just about ready to melt the doors with her plasma if they didn't get them open soon.

There was a tense moment where they both seemed to be holding their breath before they heard the bright, clear 'ding', and the doors opened. Somehow, the sound was a blessing this time instead of a nuisance.

"I _think_ you've killed it, Doc." Shego said in a deadpan tone, then, and Drakken noticed that he was still pushing the button. Sighing, he drew his finger away, not finding the will to say something sarcastic back, but at least treating her to a quick glare.

Drakken crouched down to pick up his discarded tie and jacket, slipping the jacket on and stuffing the tie in a pocket. He looked at Shego's suddenly stiff posture and tight lips and was glad of the fact that they were no longer locked in the elevator together.

For some reason, however, she wasn't moving, as if she was waiting for something. Drakken looked away nervously and spotted something black and small lying in the corner. Upon further inspection, it turned out to be Shego's panties, and he picked them up for her. He'd been so quick to get them off earlier that he hadn't noticed that they matched her bra; not that he would've paid much attention to the fact at that point, anyway. She'd wanted to look nice tonight, it seemed, just like in that article.

He cleared his throat. "Uh, here. Your...um..."

"Thanks."She mumbled as she snatched the panties out of his hand, hastily stuffing the flimsy piece of underwear into the cleavage of her bra, not finding anywhere else to put it as her skirt didn't have any pockets. She certainly wasn't going to put the considerably expensive panties back on when she was so...gooey downstairs.

Drakken walked in front of her out of the elevator, a bit unsteadily, letting out the occasional little sigh. Not knowing what else to do, she trailed after him as he headed for the kitchen. Every time her thighs grazed each other beneath her skirt, she could feel a layer of stickiness on her skin. She shook her head and frowned at his broad back, not sure if that sensation should be making her grin with satisfaction or if she should be trying to ignore it.

Once in the kitchen, Drakken started running himself a glass of water from the sink, and she suddenly realized that she herself had become quite thirsty as well. Before she could ask, though, he was already handing her a glass of her own. Faced with his eyes on her again, she gave another small cough, casting her eyes down, accepting the water and drinking.

It was the best glass of water she'd ever had, like it was quenching a fire in her throat. As she drank, a dull thump started up behind her eyes, not quite like a headache, but like the vaguely painful sensation she'd get whenever there was something that really bothered her. Not for the first time, she wished she was better at expressing her feelings—it was as much about inability as it was about reluctance— if not to others, then at least to herself. Of course she had some idea what her problem was, of course it had to do with not knowing how to deal with what they'd just done, but she couldn't put better words to it. She didn't quite know yet what she wanted or what exactly she was afraid of happening.

She tried leaning on the counter with her elbow, but it was too low, and for a second she was afraid she'd fall, but she caught herself quickly. He didn't seem to have noticed. Sighing almost inaudibly, she shifted her hip, again feeling the stickiness of her thighs as a constant reminder.

Drakken bit his lip in worry before he took a long drink of water. What now? She couldn't even look him in the eye? A shy Shego wasn't something he was used to, and he wasn't sure if he liked it. At least he knew the reason for it, but as to how to fix it...well, there he was lost.

The last time he'd found himself in post-coital circumstances with a woman, it had been in a bed, not in an elevator, and it had been late, so they'd opted for sleeping afterwards. Not much of a problem there. And in the morning, they'd both had things to do, and had gone their separate ways after a quick breakfast, only a small amount of tension-filled lingering.

Now, however…there seemed to be no natural transition. They were just sort of…hovering near the kitchen counter together as they drank the water, and neither of them seemed to be quite sure where to rest their eyes, yet neither of them were leaving, either. After a few moments of it flitting nervously about, Drakken's gaze finally fixed itself on the black-and-white-checkered pattern of the floor.

The last time hadn't been with anybody he'd already had any kind of relationship with, it hadn't been with anybody he'd have to see on a daily basis afterwards; in fact, he'd only bumped into her by coincidence maybe a couple of times in all the years since. This, however, was Shego. He'd still have to work with her after this. And he knew her, she was a big part of his life, the person he talked the most to outside of his own mother, so never seeing her again just…wasn't an option.

So somehow, he had to make this okay. He had to make it okay that they'd just…like it didn't have to ruin anything.

Maybe if he tried talking? Breaking the silence would be good, right? Maybe if he tried talking normally about normal things, like...like work? Everything felt so unusual, so new and weird and raw, but if he tried easing them back into something familiar, that should do the trick, right?

He cleared his throat before he spoke; even if he'd just had a glass of water, his throat felt thick and hoarse. "So, um, we still need to go over the layout for that museum."He began, hoping he sounded casual. "I still need that key and that map if we're supposed to be able to track down that ancient alien technology I heard about on the net."

Shego's gaze dropped slowly from where she'd been staring at the bowl of fruit on the top of the fridge until her vision nearly swam. "What?"

She sounded a little surprised, like she'd thought she must've heard him wrong or something, and he got a sudden bad feeling that he was _not_ helping the situation, but he didn't know what else to say, so he just ran with it. He clutched the glass in his hands, and the sleek, cool surface felt good against his somewhat clammy palms; bracing. "Well, you know," he ventured, "we haven't had time to do that yet, and we need to scope the place out before we go, to secure a quick entry and escape. It's already this Monday, after all."

There was a hopeless, heavy silence for a moment before her voice ripped right through it, loud, ringing in the kitchen like a gunshot. "_Fuck_ the museum!"

"Sh-Shego!" Her anger was sharp and fearsome, and came unexpectedly like thunder. Somehow, hearing her say that word now was much more shocking than it had been when she'd said it during…during.

Sneering, Shego slammed her glass down on the kitchen counter with a bang. "We just had— we did— and now you still expect me to just _ignore_ it and _work_?"She demanded in a tremulous ramble, contempt, confusion, disbelief and a tiny sliver of hurt the jumbled components of her voice. Why in the world was he bringing up work _now_? Had he no tact whatsoever? Didn't he care? Did he think this was something ordinary, like a chore on a list that they could just tick off now, after a job well done, and move on to the next one? What was he even _thinking_? And _he _was supposed to be the sensitive one?

"B-but Shego, you _promised_ you'd help me out tonight, remember?"Drakken tried in his best hey-now-let's-be-reasonable-here kind of tone. "Why are you so annoyed?"

Her incredulity was conveyed even better by her expression than her voice then; she thought he was insane. "Because you're acting so— ugh!" Shego almost stomped her foot to empathize her point, but stopped herself just in time.

"What?"He asked timidly. How had _this_ happened now? Not even half an hour ago, _he'd_ been the angry, frustrated one, and _she'd_ been the one who'd been trying and failing at her attempts at calming him down. If he didn't know any better, he'd believe this was some kind of ironic punishment dealt to him by fate for how he'd acted all week. It was only now that it began to dawn on him that despite her teasing, Shego had probably had a pretty stressful week as well. He couldn't have been easy for her to deal with lately, when he'd been like that practically twenty-four hours a day, but he'd only considered himself and not how he might've been affecting those around him.

Shego took a deep breath, gesturing uncertainly as she tried to find the words. "It's like you're trying to act as if nothing just happened!"

His eyes widened. No wonder she was mad, if_ that_ was what she thought he was doing. But then, somewhere at the back of his mind, a curious, elated thought flashed by— so she_ didn't_ want to ignore this, she_ didn't_ want to pretend it never took place? _Why_ exactly _was_ that? Could that possibly mean that she might want— and then the thought was gone as he was forced to focus on the problem at hand.

"No, no, you've got it all wrong!"He told her hastily, starting to reach out for her arms to add the weight of touch to his desperate reassuring; he let his hands fall back to his sides as he caught her reserved, grim expression. "I'm not!"He exclaimed breathlessly. "I'm just— just trying to make this easier!"

"Make it _easier_?" There was a cold stab in her gut. That did _not_ sound good. That sounded like something somebody might say before dumping somebody else.

He hesitated as he wondered how to explain himself, not wanting any more misunderstandings. "Well, you know, we didn't exactly plan this, and it's a little...awkward."He finally settled for.

_Oh, right, so __**now**__ you regret it!_ She thought furiously. _Well, now it's too late! _"You know, when I said you needed to get laid, I didn't actually mean by _me_!"She snapped, blurting out the only thing she could think of to say. Suddenly, she needed _him_ to be confused, _him_ to be off center and just slightly hurt.

He took a step back at her acerbic words. What was she trying to do? What did she mean? It wasn't as if she hadn't been willing, it wasn't as she hadn't wanted— and he didn't just go out and 'get laid' randomly; if he did, he wouldn't have ended up like this in the first place, with the repressed sexual energy of several years suddenly boiling over one night. He'd reacted like that because he'd wanted _her_, not just anybody. It had been _her _who'd driven him crazy, whether he liked it or not. He knew her, he cared about her even if nobody was allowed to show those kinds of feelings in the world of Shego...and now he'd wanted her.

"But Shego...who else was I supposed to do that with?"He asked feebly. Really, who else was there? His mind racing, he couldn't come up with anybody he'd rather have done that with. None of the women he saw when they went to villain conventions or grocery shopping, none of the women his mother tried to set him up with from time to time, not the last woman he'd slept with, many years ago...

Her heart sank at his words; he'd only done it because she'd _been_ _there_, because she was the only woman he knew well enough, because she was the only option, really— he hadn't actually done it because he—

Cautiously, she let her gaze drift up to his face.

She halted when she saw what was there, in his eyes, and in his voice as he repeated her name to get her attention, sounding almost concerned. Maybe he _hadn't_ just done it because she was _anyone_, after all; maybe he _had _actually done it because she was_ her_...

"Really, Shego, who else would I do that with?"He asked, his voice growing softer as he saw her strangely anxious expression.

"I...I don't know."She replied earnestly, and she hated the hopeful feeling that turned up in her then. She was no stranger to casual sex, but somehow, no matter how impulsive it had been, this hadn't felt like it. So what if...

He smiled faintly, looking satisfied with her answer. "Me neither." He yawned hugely, all of a sudden, and patted her shoulder. "Oh, you know what?"He said, trying to stifle the next yawn. "I think I just want to go to bed. I feel dead tired. We'll leave the planning for tomorrow."

Before she could bring herself to stop him, he was already walking away, and again, there was that sinking feeling, except now it was accompanied by a cold sensation in her chest.

Okay, so she supposed that she couldn't exactly expect cuddling after random elevator sex with Dr. D of all people, but to just leave like that without even a peck on the cheek, that was just...rude.

Rude and uncaring.

It hadn't mattered to him after all, had it? It had just kind of..._happened, _and he'd moved on, and now, she realized— the worries she'd suppressed earlier in the elevator rapidly flooding back— every little sigh, every moan, every groan, every yell she'd uttered in response to him would serve as building blocks, one by one, adding to his already massive ego. Every time she'd try to bother him from now on, it would roll like water off of a duck's back as he re-opened his own little mental library of all the things she'd done that had made him sure he'd rocked her world. And not only that, it was obvious to her now that this had been a one-time thing, nothing to linger on, let's get on with business as usual—

Suddenly, her legs felt weak and she needed very badly to sit down on the couch, but realized she couldn't because the insides of her thighs were still all sticky with—

_Oh, shit...oh, no..._

She started shivering for no apparent reason— the lair wasn't cold or anything— and it took her a moment or two before it dawned on her that she was on the verge of crying. Growling, she forced the tears back before they could spill down her cheeks, dabbing at her eyes with the back of her hands, trying not to ruin her make-up, and feeling the familiar anger building inside of her, red hot and reassuring, blasting away the icy sadness in her gut.

Her train of thought brought the horrible realization that she'd actually assumed that it had meant something more— and how could he_ do_ that to her, how could he make her want more— and then just—

She was going to kill him. She was going to smash his lab equipment. She was going to—

"Shego! Are you coming or not?"

"...huh?"

She spun around at the sound of his impatient voice, and saw him standing in the doorway with his hand on his hip.

"_Excuse _me?"She asked, and she must've sounded harsher than she'd intended, because he looked as if he became acutely insecure; a big change from the somewhat cocky tone he'd used earlier.

"Don't you want to...you know...I mean, I thought, after everything, maybe you'd want to...stay in my room? Just for tonight," he added quickly, holding up his hands, as he recognized the fact that he might be assuming too much, suddenly needing to hold back. He shouldn't have simply expected her to _follow_ him! How did he get _that_ delusion into his head?

Shego gawked at him. Wait..._wait _a minute...he'd wanted her to _follow_ him when he'd gone to bed? But how was she supposed to have known that?

As she listened to his stuttering explanation and his intentions dawned on her, all traces of the former rage and regret melted out of her, a light, soothing and scary warmth spreading through her; her heart swelling.

How had she managed to work herself up like that in such a short time— gah, almost even _crying_, for pity's sake— how could she have been struck so deeply by this? And where in the world was her ever-present self-confidence? Since when was she this emotional? Why hadn't she realized that Dr. D, while he could be inconsiderate and blind, had never had a heart of stone when it came to her? He wouldn't have done something like that; he was just as shaken by all this as her, he didn't take this lightly, and he certainly wouldn't just— he wouldn't. She should've known, she should've been calmer. She should've given him the benefit of the doubt.

Because now he wanted her to come share his bed with him. He wanted her in his arms, in his bedroom...

"Oh, yeah?"She demanded, rebelling against the decidedly mushy path her thoughts were going down all of a sudden."And what would we be doing _there_?"

Drakken shuffled his feet a little, shrugging almost apologetically. "I was thinking of...going to sleep, actually, if that's okay. I didn't get much sleep this week."

After Tuesday, he'd spent most nights lying awake for hours, just replaying the irritating events of the day, muttering under his breath, cursing and wincing about them, tossing and turning. The few hours of sleep he'd gotten had been far from enough, and the tiredness had only decreased his tolerance for stress even further. Looking back now, it wasn't really surprising that he'd finally gone over the edge. And now, whether she'd agree to follow him or not, he had to sleep. There was no chance of him having the energy to have sex again, or even stay up and talk all that much longer. He felt like he might fall asleep on his feet if he didn't get to bed soon. First, though, he needed a shower.

Shego sighed inwardly; sleeping sounded pretty good right about now. This week hadn't been all that much easier for her than it had been for him. After all, she'd often been the one in the line of fire of his wrath, and certainly the one who'd had to listen to him complaining. He'd bossed her around even more than usual, keeping her jumping all week, giving her ridiculous tasks to do seemingly 'just because'.

"Really? Gee, I didn't _notice_."She said, feeling like she was rallying magnificently, feeling like herself again. The sarcasm felt very good, like a firm hand pulling her back from staring down into an abyss.

"Don't start."He warned, touching his forehead as if he was getting a headache.

"I won't."

"Huh?"

A small smirk tugged at one side of her mouth. "Yeah, before I can start mocking you properly again, I think I at least need a shower."

He gaped at her, some suspicious, suspenseful feeling setting in as alarm bells went off in his head. "...you're _really_ going to mock me? Even _now_?"

Shego made a careless gesture. "I might, unless I fall asleep first."

"Wait...you're...you're not going to tease me about...about...? _Are_ you?" He stuttered, sudden fear hitting him like a shock wave.

No, even _she_ wouldn't...she _couldn't_...! Oh, he should've seen this coming, shouldn't he? Now that the tension had lessened considerably and they'd started bantering again, or at least she had, he should've known it would only be a matter of time before the regular Shego returned, the one who teased and taunted him, self-assured and presumptuous, instead of the one who kissed him and touched him and was anxious and abashed around him.

But how could even _she_ take something this intimate and private and turn it into...how _could_ she? Disappointment churned in his gut; he felt like he was waking up from some sort wonderful dream only to find that reality couldn't measure up to it.

She blinked at him as she suddenly realized that he was looking completely vulnerable, uncertainty and a hint of wounded self-esteem about him, and that he was unwittingly putting himself at her mercy. What a stupid thing to do.

If she wanted to, she could make him doubt himself and have him wrapped around her little finger in no time. The thought made her feel more powerful than she'd ever felt before in her life, green killer plasma and all. Apparently, she might have the power to break his spirit. Of course, that was completely ignoring the very, very discomfiting piece of knowledge that lurked in the depths of her mind, telling her that breaking_ him_ might just only break _her._

Whether she liked it or not, there had to have been some kind of reason why she'd agreed so quickly to do that with him, and why she'd been able to throw herself into it so easily. It was almost as if she'd unconsciously been waiting for it to happen one day...although _that_ was a rather intimidating thought that she would have to file away in her brain and examine some other time instead, when she was a little more distanced from all this. If she'd been walking around with these thoughts and hadn't even really known it, well...that was just too much to even contemplate right then.

"No," she heard herself say. "I won't tease you. Not about that."

He reluctantly lifted his gaze to hers, somewhat unwilling to believe her, just in case it was some sort of trick. "Really?"He queried warily.

Why would she show him that sort of kindness? Why would she suddenly go easy on him when she usually never did? Surely something like this would have to be, as she'd called it once, 'mocking gold'? How could she resist such an opportunity?

He'd always been prone to bouts of optimism and couldn't help but hope a little and to want to take her intentions at face value, but he wanted to be careful not to get too carried away. This time, he couldn't _afford_ to hope. He needed to be _sure_.

There was a soft chuckle from her. "Oh, ye of little faith. Mocking when there's nothing to mock is a waste of my fabulous mocking talents." Shego shook her head, smirking again, wider this time. "I mean, _hello_— unless you went temporarily deaf and blind from the shock of _actually having sex_, you must've noticed me enjoying myself."

Technically, it hadn't been_ the_ very best sex she'd ever had, but mentally, it had definitely been the most exciting and satisfying. She wasn't going to sell him short just yet, though; the other guy who'd topped Drakken had after all had a lot more experience and had certainly gotten many more opportunities to perfect his technique with her at the time.

For a first attempt after what she would bet had to have been a prolonged sexual absence for him, Dr. D had done spectacularly well. She would definitely have to give him another go. She was sure he wouldn't mind. She didn't want to compliment him too much, though, or he'd only end up with an even bigger ego. Still, she'd found she couldn't outright _lie _about it. Not_ this_.

"Well...yes."He admitted cautiously. He'd been pretty certain of that, yes, but one could never be too certain with Shego. He wouldn't have put it past her to deny her obvious pleasure later, either to vex him or to protect her own pride or both...but now she wasn't, and it frankly surprised him. She'd surprised him a lot today, really. The fact that she was not only refraining from taunting him but even sort of praising his efforts seemed unusually mature, earnest, respectful and even...kind of her. So it wasn't any wonder that it left him uneasy, confused and a little skeptical.

She tilted her head. "So why do you think I'd make fun of you?"

His tone was definitely sardonic when he answered. "Because you somehow _always_ find a way to make fun of_ everything_."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah."

Shego didn't get offended. Instead, a lazy, indulgent grin appeared on her lips. "Okay...then take me to your bedroom, and I'll mock the interior design for you."

"Gee, sounds like _I'm_ in for a fun time."He groaned, but it was mostly for show. He'd actually managed to convince her to sleep with him in his bed that night, so who was he to complain?

"So, what about me?"She asked with a flirtatious, shameless smirk, as they walked down the long hallway that held both their rooms. "How was I?"

Drakken's ears felt flaming red as he blushed and ducked his head at the direct question. "I think you know the answer," he mumbled, a short, uncomfortable laugh slipping out of him.

"Yeah," Shego grinned, her eyes twinkling, and she was looking and sounding curiously flattered and even slightly giggly for someone who usually seemed so confident that they needed no reassurance at all.

When she squeezed his arm, he knew he'd managed to say and do the right things eventually.

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**Author's note:** Happy belated Valentines Day...or something. 

Thanks to Sitchit for helping me with the beta for this chapter, and for illustrating the first chapter. Check out my deviantART account to see her great drawing.

Also thanks to Zoza for giving me the final seal of approval before publishing.

Sex in the elevator. It's a classic. People say that sex scenes are some of the most difficult things to write, and oh boy...they really _are_. I've been rewriting this chapter a million times.

Yeah, Iike Poptartfrog said in the reviews for the first chapter, you'd think it would be either Shego taking the initiative, or that it would be a mutual decision when they had sex for the first time, but I wanted to go with another scenario. I wrote it this way because I wanted to write a D/S piece where it was actually Drakken who took the initiative, and I figured Drakken would have to be really stressed out to be this aggressive with her. In my other stories, it's usually Shego who's the bold one.

And I wanted it to be impulsive; I didn't want to have them discussing and analyzing their relationship for fifty days first, because sometimes things do just work out like this instead. The hesitation and discussion is left to _Maslow_.

And no, despite popular speculation, I don't follow the fan-based theory of Drakken being a virgin. I just think it's been _way_ too many years since he last had sex. _Waaaaay_ too many.

"**I still need that key and that map if we're supposed to be able to track down that ancient alien technology I heard about on the net.": **This has nothing to do with anything. I just needed a random plan. Thanks to Teh Dipstick for helping me brainstorm.

**Fuck:** While I personally don't find anything wrong with saying 'the f-word', I won't have Shego going around saying 'fuck' all the time like some OOC character— she won't say it again at all, in fact. She only said it twice because she was a) to be blunt; fucking and liking it, and b) she found herself in the awkward aftermath of a very unusual situation and was quite upset at what seemed like blatant insensitivity and inconsideration from Drakken.

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	3. Big, Red, Round Bed

**Stress****! Stress! Stress!**

Ninnik Nishukan**

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Summary:** This is how frustration somewhere between _Larry's Birthday_ and _Graduation, _and obviously goes AU or whatever you call it.** Warning: DO NOT READ! Contains highly detailed acts of a sexual nature! BOO!

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Finally, Shego came back from her shower, her long hair looking blow-dried and fresh.

Even if he'd had his shower in his own private bathroom and didn't have to wait his turn, he'd had to wait quite a while for her. If he hadn't felt so nervous about the unusual situation, he would've fallen asleep.

When she halted in front of him where he was sitting on the edge of his bed, watching television, he found himself standing up attentively as he saw her, fumbling with the remote and quickly switching the TV off. With a pinch in his gut, he realized that he had to look like a dork to her, acting all skittish like that.

Suddenly he was _very_ glad he'd remembered to remove his teddy bear from his bed and hide it in a drawer.

To his surprise, however, she didn't make fun of him. She only dithered a little, running her fingers through her hair in an almost self-conscious manner. They stood there looking dumbly at each other, and he noticed that her pajama bottoms were flannel, like his own, and a soft shade of green to match the strappy cotton undershirt she was also wearing. Somehow, getting to see her in her night clothes in his bedroom felt nearly even more intimate than what they'd done earlier.

Shego's gaze travelled across his room, her eyebrows rising at the questionable decor, but she found herself with no snappy comments when her eyes met his, and she simply she stood there, looking at him looking at her. He was wearing a black, comfy-looking T-shirt, and she'd seen him in those stripy, blue pajama pants before, but now that he was wearing them inside his bedroom and they were about to turn in for the night together instead of apart as usual, as they were about to actually _share a bed_—

The whole scene just felt so warm and domestic to her, such a stark contrast to the wild, unexpected and somewhat intimidating passion of what had happened in the elevator...but at the same time, the current situation actually felt _more_ intimidating, in a way.

This wasn't some random thing that was happening because they were overcome by their emotions and their hormones, this was them _deliberately_ coming together, doing their nightly rituals and putting on their night clothes with the conscious intention of preparing themselves for sleeping in the same bed. There was no excuse for this.

Not that there was any believable excuse for what they'd done earlier, either.

What did he see on her face? Could he tell what she was thinking?

He'd seen her without her make-up on plenty of times before, whenever she'd been sick, whenever they'd bumped into each other during early mornings— and maintaining your make-up wasn't exactly an option when you were on the run from the law with nothing but a prison uniform and a couple of bent spoons and toothbrushes on your person— but for some reason, this time she suddenly felt quite naked now that she'd removed it.

_Gah...maybe this was a bad idea._

She took a step back, her teeth sinking worriedly into the inside of her bottom lip.

_What was I__ thinking, agreeing to sleep in his bed as if—_

The frown spread across Drakken's whole face, his frame tensing up and his hand reaching out for her tentatively— even though she was on the other side of the room— before dropping back to his side. It made her hesitate again, but this time she was uncertain whether she actually wanted to _leave_, not whether she wanted to _stay_.

—_but then again, __**he**__ was the one who invited __**me**__, it would be __**his**__ fault—_ she'd have somebody to blame. It wasn't as if _she'd_ suggested— fine. It was fine. She could do this.

It was funny; here _she'd_ been the one who'd practically torn him a new one, accusing him of trying to ignore the whole thing like a jerk, yet now there she was, contemplating turning tail and running when he'd done the complete opposite of what she'd accused him of and had invited her to sleep with him— _literally_ this time.

Shaking her head almost unnoticeably, Shego took a step towards Drakken. She might as well just go ahead.

She showed him a lopsided smirk. "So, is the Incredible Hulk feeling a little calmer now? Or does Hulk still feel like smashing something?" Reaching out, Shego placed a hand on Drakken's chest. Drakken looked down and saw that it was over his heart.

Looking up and meeting her gaze, he noticed that there was something else behind the amusement, and it dawned on him that maybe she really _had_ been worried that he might just...well, actually have a heart attack. Briefly, he felt a spark of annoyance flare up in him; was _that_ what she thought of him? Okay, so he was older than her, but it wasn't as if he was some crotchety geezer— he was only forty-two, not sixty-seven, and he was in no danger of—

Still, her concern was oddly touching, even if she caked about fifteen layers of sarcasm, cynicism and teasing over it. Now that he had indeed calmed down, he could almost find her false bravado endearing, no matter how exasperating it could get and no matter how many times he'd wished she'd be more straightforward about expressing her thoughts and feelings. It didn't exactly help that he wasn't the most experienced man in having to deal with the female psyche in relationship situations, either, and especially since Shego was a particularly tough nut to crack.

He considered telling her that he'd never had any problems with high blood pressure, but that would be acknowledging the fact that he knew she'd been concerned about his health in the first place, and he wasn't sure how well she'd take that.

"I'm okay," he said simply, unwilling to rise to the bait of the 'Hulk' remark.

She snorted. "Sure. Now let's get you to bed before you collapse or something."

Suddenly, he transformed into his grumpy old self again. "I don't look _that_ bad!"

Shego waved a hand at his face. "The circles around your eyes are more..._circly_ than usual, if that's even possible."

"Well, then maybe you could've been more considerate and hurried up so I could get to bed," he huffed, not appreciating the comment about his appearance. "What took you so long, anyway?"

"Oh, I remembered something and had to take a little detour..." She answered enigmatically.

"Hmm?"

"You forgot about the fact that there are security cameras in the elevators, didn't you?" She asked in a flat tone, not waiting for an answer. "Yeah, so did I."

Drakken blanched. "Oh, snap. Did any henchmen see...?"

Shego shook her head. "Apparently, Jimmy was on duty tonight."

He frowned. "Jimmy...? Since when do you bother to learn the names of the henchmen?"

"I don't," Shego said simply, shrugging. "That's just what he told me his name was. But I've seen him around— you know, short, stocky, falls asleep on duty a lot?"

"Oh, _Jimmy_, right— I found him slumped over the control board last Wednesday...and those henchmen have the _nerve_ to demand higher wages! They don't even do their jobs properly and— wait, he _was_ asleep, right?" Drakken begged, his eyes wide. "_Please_ tell me that he was asleep."

Shego nodded. "Out cold, Doc. So I swiped the tape and gave him a lecture."

Drakken let out a heavy, relieved sigh. "I never thought I'd say this, but thank goodness for incompetent henchmen."

"_I'll_ say," Shego agreed dryly, rolling her eyes. "That would've been _kiiiinda_ awkward at the next bowling night."

There was a pause.

Drakken drew a shallow little breath and sent her an expectant look. "So, um...where's the tape?"

"I burned it," she told him matter-of-factly.

Drakken blinked. "Oh." He was surprised to realize that he actually felt vaguely...disappointed, hearing that.

Disappointment that Shego immediately picked up on; her eyebrow cocking. "What, you wanted to _watch_ it or something?"

Drakken gaped. "What? No, of _course_ not!"

"Kinky, Doc," she remarked, her mouth quirking as she tried not to smile. "Didn't know you were into that sort of thing."

Groaning, Drakken rubbed his eye with the heel of his hand. "Look, can we just go to _sleep_ now?"

She laughed. "Okay."

They stared at each other.

"So, which side do you wanna sleep on?" She asked, trying to break the sudden and somewhat uncomfortable silence.

He shrugged one shoulder, gesturing uncertainly towards the bed. "I don't know, I usually just sleep...you know, in the middle."

The middle. Figured. Single child and mad scientist bachelor. He'd probably never really had to share. "So anywhere is fine," she said; it was more of a statement than a question.

Again, he shrugged. "I guess."

"Right, so..." Clearing her throat softly, she removed her slippers and started to climb into bed.

He didn't follow, and when she hesitated, on her knees and about to lift the comforter to slip under it, she noticed him staring down at her and followed his gaze. When it ended on her chest, where a bit of cleavage was showing because she was leaning forward, she groaned and rolled her eyes. "Oh, for crying out loud, Dr. D," she scolded mildly, tugging her top up somewhat self-consciously, covering herself.

Drakken harrumphed loudly and looked away, his face feeling hot. It hadn't been as much the sight of her cleavage as it had been the sight of her cleavage as she was crawling into _his_ bed that had fascinated him. The concept of Shego being in his bed was just...very strange.

He hadn't been oogling her chest. He'd been looking at _all_ of her; his gaze had just happened to be..._there_, when she'd noticed him looking, that was all. Not that _she'd_ accept that explanation; she was probably too used to men looking at her chest.

Finally feeling awkward just standing there, Drakken hurried under the comforter.

They laid there stiffly next to each other on their backs— not touching, just staring up at the ceiling— as if they were amnesiac abductees who'd been randomly dropped in a deserted field by aliens and didn't know what they were doing there.

Finally, Shego broke the silence, a small note of irritation in her voice when she spoke. "You forgot to turn off the light."

"Oh, uh...no, I've installed a...uh, clapper," Drakken replied, and sure enough, the lights went out when he reached up and clapped his hands twice.

Now, Shego's voice was full of incredulous mirth. "You have a _clapper_? Oh, that is _so_ nineties!"

"So what?" He shot back, unable to come up with a better argument.

"That's just so—" She halted, and turned to him all of a sudden; probably to send him that skeptical look she loved to give him, forgetting he wouldn't be able to see it in the dark. "Oh, _please_ don't tell me you're afraid of the dark!"

"_Excuse _me?" He sputtered.

"You're afraid of the _dark_, aren't you?" She taunted, poking his shoulder with a finger. "That's why you have a clapper, so you don't have to get out of bed to turn off the light!"

"Give me some _credit _here, Shego! I'm a grown man!" Drakken chided. Again, he was infinitely grateful he'd remembered to put away his teddy bear.

"Oh, really?"

"Have you even considered the fact that perhaps I use the clapper because I'd like to avoid accidentally stumbling into the _moat_ in the dark?" Drakken asked witheringly, gritting his teeth.

"You've got a point there, Doc," Shego admitted in an upbeat tone that he knew well; it meant that she was only partly agreeing with him and was looking forward to sending another zinger his way. "And I guess I should expect somebody who actually thinks it's a good idea to put a _moat full of dangerous chemical waste_ in their _bedroom_ to also consider the clapper as, y'know, _not _a total waste of money."

"It's not dangerous chemical waste, it's just artificially colored water!" He explained, getting huffy. "It's part of the decor! I think it looks ominous, and it keeps the henchmen from trying to snoop around here, okay?"

"Oh, in that case I take back _everything_ I said about your talent for wasting money," she drawled sarcastically.

He sighed. "Look, I just...I saw the clapper on TV late one night and thought it looked...cool, that's all."

"Good grief," Shego clucked her tongue. "Whenever I come across the Shopping Channel while zapping, I always wonder 'Who actually _buys_ this stuff?', but now I guess I know. No wonder we never have any money."

"What's wrong with the clapper?" Drakken objected snippily. "It's convenient and useful!"

"You know..." She began, in mock wonder. "I never thought I'd ever be glad you squandered Kimmie's boyfriend's money, but now I realize the alternative coulda been _so_ much worse. We coulda been up to our _ears_ in useless Shopping Channel junk!" She chuckled.

"Nnngh...!"

Her laughter annoyed him, but at the same time, it seemed to unwind them both, and he sighed softly when she shifted to make herself more comfortable; she was obviously getting ready to sleep, and so should he. He'd been so exhausted, and he still was, he'd just forgotten about it because she'd distracted him.

Rolling around on his stomach and resting his cheek against the pillow, he felt himself slowly relax, but some of the nerves remained there, stiffening his frame, and he couldn't quite fall asleep.

Shego sighed, content, when she'd wiggled herself into a nice sleeping position. Dr. D really had a comfy bed; big, soft and with perfect pillows and a generous and heavy but not stifling comforter.

She paused at that thought.

Dr. Drakken Had A Comfy Bed.

And. She. Was. In. It.

Really.

_With_ him.

Weird.

She'd certainly never mooned over the Doc— heck, she'd hardly mooned over anybody even back in high school— she'd never really...well, now that she thought about it, she wasn't even sure if she'd ever had a completely conscious thought about actually being attracted to him.

There had been _some_ sorts of thoughts, though. There had been little flashes where she'd _wondered_...and she'd been vaguely aware of the fact that she'd started worrying about him lately, that she'd maybe been standing just a little closer than usual, maybe touched him more...

...but other than that, she hadn't known, not really. All of this had come as a punch to the face. Hard and fast and unexpected.

Now that she was lying there next to him, she could feel that his body was taut as a bowstring even if he was so exhausted— and she got it, she really did. She got what was the matter. She wasn't sure what exactly he was afraid she'd do or say, but she got it. Because this was all just so..._unfamiliar_.

Picking absentmindedly at the comforter, she tried to remember when she'd last...well, actually cuddled with a man.

And she came up blank.

That bronzed beach hunk four years ago? What's-his-face? Bobby? Billy? No, she'd gone back to her hotel room.

She went through a mental list— it wasn't long, as being an evil sidekick was a demanding job and had kept her very busy, but there was still a handful of guys— and...nothing.

The guy would usually fall asleep and she'd leave, or they'd both leave, or she'd leave even if he hadn't fallen asleep.

Nobody had ever invited her into their own bed in their own room, dressed in pajamas, and with no other intention than sleeping.

Biting her lip, she wondered if Drakken had ever done this with a woman before. She had no idea. He might have, she supposed, since he was so...well, Drakken. Kind of...personal and sensitive and needy and...yeah.

It must've been years ago, though, if ever.

There was an unsettling pang of...of _something_; loneliness, need, cold, _something_...in her chest, and she wasn't certain whether she was feeling it for him or for herself.

All she knew was that she got the urge to move closer, so she did, curling her body into his side. She felt him draw a quiet, quick breath and his body tightening with surprise before he relaxed again, letting out a little sigh. A strange sort of tingle went through her when he turned his head slowly and buried his nose in her hair, inhaling almost curiously.

"Smell good?" She teased, hoping to embarrass him a little to break her _own _embarrassment.

But he only nodded. "Mhmm."

When he slipped his arm around her so she could rest there and drew her closer, she started feeling just a little dizzy with the unaccustomed situation. She wasn't used to being treated like this or treating somebody like this. He was very sleepy, she could tell, yet he wasn't falling asleep, he was just sort of...exploring her carefully, as if in wonder; smelling her hair, touching her arms and hands, nuzzling her forehead. It was as if he was doing it all just because of the simple joy of being able to, and maybe it was also because he was just a little nervous that he wouldn't get the chance again.

And she found herself reciprocating, shifting against him lazily. Her face moving upwards and rubbing against his neck slowly, her fingers spreading on his solar plexus, she wondered if he could feel the way she seemed to be vibrating, almost trembling; what with, she didn't know, but she was treading unfamiliar waters and wasn't quite sure how to feel.

Suddenly, she needed to speak.

Her head felt fuzzy and detached, and she needed something solid, ordinary, something well-known.

"You know," she remarked idly, looking up into the dark, hazy shadows of the ceiling, "your bedside lamp is incredibly tacky."

Drakken groaned as he was pulled out of the pleasant reverie. He should've known she wasn't done mocking him for the evening. Mocking the interior design of his room was the one promise he should've _known_ she'd keep.

"I'm asleep," he muttered, "I can't hear you."

"And your dresser has seen better days," she went on, sounding like she was having the time of her life as she played with his hair, running her finger in circles over the spot where she'd had to cut off some of his hair earlier that week. He very much doubted it was a coincidence. She was clearly baiting him. Even for all of her speeches about him needing to calm down, she was _clearly_ baiting him.

"I can't heeeeaaaar yooooou..." He insisted in a sing-song voice, rolling over on his side and away from her.

This didn't seem to faze her at all. She simply scooted after him, hooking her chin over his shoulder and talking basically right into his ear. He shuddered; oh, great— mocking at close range, even.

"And this bed looks like you've bought it off the set from some kind of cheesy seventies Blaxploitation movie," she said with the kind of casual cheerfulness that she only derived from bugging the life out of him. "Did they throw in a free Foxy Brown poster when you got it?"

"Sheeegooo....!" Drakken moaned as he flopped over on his back again; he was definitely developing a headache.

"Does your stereo have any Barry White records?" She asked, leaning her head on his arm.

"Don't you ever _stop_?" He asked, sending her an exhausted, desperate look that she wouldn't be able to see in any case.

Shego went on as if he'd never even spoken; now she was fiddling with the panel of buttons on the wall behind his bed. "If I press this button, will a disco ball be lowered from the ceiling?"

"If I hit you over the head with the tacky lamp, will you pass out so I can _sleep_?" He retorted sharply, nearing the end of his rope. An alien, startling kind of thought flashed across his vexed mind;_ I'm going to screw her brains out in the morning for doing this to me...!_ Shocked, he risked a glance at her, almost as if afraid that she'd read his mind. She didn't seem upset, though; in fact, she was chuckling. He relaxed.

"Oooh, an actual _comeback_! And almost _clever_, too," she grinned, snuggling into the bend of his arm and actually kissing the tip of his ear with what seemed like fondness. "Mmm..."

She fell quiet then, and eventually, after about a couple of minutes, Drakken realized with a small amount of disbelief that it was because she had in fact fallen asleep. Huh. That seemed to be that. Whatever it was that she'd been after, it seemed like she'd found it.

He smiled at her sleeping face, leaning down to kiss her cheek. She snorted softly at that, wrinkling her nose, but soon her face went slack with sleep again.

Of course, as he was about to doze off himself, it dawned on him that the weight of her head was cutting off the blood flow to his arm and that, come morning, it would be completely numb.

He would bet no other villains had this problem with_ their_ sidekicks.

...then again, he realized, he didn't _know_ any other villains who actually _had _any sidekicks.

He grinned smugly to himself, affectionately tightening his hold on Shego and leaning his cheek against her hair as he slowly slipped into slumber.

Those idiots. They had no idea what they were missing by being so reclusive.

And that included the mocking.

* * *

The next morning, they were rudely awoken by the loud jangling of the telephone. Drakken fumbled for the lamp on his nightstand and turned it on, but the phone was on Shego's side of the bed, so he was forced to nudge her to get her to pick it up.

Shego sat bolt upright in bed, looking disoriented before she sent the offending object a death glare, throwing herself across the bed to pick up the phone so the horrible noise would cease.

"Yeah, whaddaya want?" She greeted crankily.

"**Good morning, Dr. Drakken. I'm calling on behalf of Nelson's Auto Repair, and we would like to talk to you about our fabulous new deals on oil changes and—"**

"I'm sorry," Shego said sweetly, "but Dr. Drakken can't come to the phone right now. He's suffering from a severe telemarketing-induced migraine. Would you like to leave a message?"

Even Drakken could hear the telemarketer sputtering in surprise on the other side of the line before Shego slammed the receiver down again, falling onto her back heavily on the bed and drawing the comforter all the way up over her eyes, groaning. "That damn...pestering people in their own homes...and in the morning!" He heard her grumbling under the comforter. Eventually, she fell quiet, and he heard a soft, content sigh.

Blinking at the black mass of tangled hair sticking up from the top of his comforter, spilling all over his pillow, he scooted closer to her, carefully dragging the comforter down to her chin so he could see her face. She made a bothered whine and popped one eye open, peering at him.

"Hmm?"

He looked down at her in awe. So this was what it was like to actually have Shego on his side, for once— not just on the same side of good and evil. Oh, how good it felt to have somebody backing him up so he wouldn't have to deal with every little nuisance himself, every single day! Of course, she'd always been his sidekick, and as such, had done a lot of work for him over the years, without which he'd certainly have had an even harder time of it, but now...this felt a little different.

Yesterday, she'd been concerned for his health, and now she'd just fended off a nasty telemarketer for him; the wording she'd used to get rid of the caller had told him again that she cared about his wellbeing. He knew he'd often not been very appreciative of her, but it had taken him a while before he'd noticed it, and the fact that it sometimes left her cranky. For all of her mocking, he knew he had a good sidekick. Perhaps if he started appreciating her _now_...

"Shego, I want you to answer all my calls from now on," he announced.

She cracked a tired grin. "That's adding to my areas of expertise. I'll need a raise."

"You'll have one," he said firmly.

"Oh, yeah?" The grin tugged a bit more at her mouth. "So you're really gonna pay me money to yell at telemarketers?"

He nodded. "Basically, yes."

Evil anticipation saturated her voice. "Sounds like _my_ kinda job."

He laughed softly.

"...Dr. D?"

"Hmm?"

"When was the last time you had sex?" Shego asked, suddenly sounding serious. "Before, I mean."

The smile dropped from his face. "That's a very _personal_ question, Shego."

"We're in your bed together," she ventured in a low voice, then added, a bit more cheekily: "How much more personal can we get without getting naked again?"

He pursed his lips, frowning. "I don't see why I should tell you."

Shego sent him a lazy smile. "I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours..."

His face flushed violently, his eyes snapping open. "Shego! I don't want to know _that_!" He squeaked.

"Jealous?" She purred, running a finger down his jaw line.

"No! I just— no!" Drakken protested loudly, growing nervous. "I don't want to know when or who you've— wait, it's not anybody I _know_, is it? Uh, I mean— no! I don't want to know!"

"Come on, Doc, you can tell me..." She wheedled.

He scoffed. "Oh, please— what, just so you can _mock_ me some more?"

Her voice took on a wholly amused note. "Oh, _that_ long, huh?"

He gritted his teeth, trying to endure. "Shego..."

"We're talking _years_ here, aren't we?" She asked, and he could practically _feel_ her smirking.

He gave a heavy sigh. "Far too long, okay?"

"Was it before or after 'U Can't Touch This' came out?" Shego asked innocently.

"I'll have you know it was _after_ Hammer time, thank you very much!" Drakken sniped back.

"Oh, yeah?" Shego chuckled. "Before or after the Macarena?"

"Nnngghh!"

"Aww, come on, Doc," she gave a fake pout, tugging at his sleeve. "Just having a little fun."

"At my expense, as usual," he grumbled.

Her demeanour flickered back to seriousness, then, and she made a contemplative sound in her throat before she moved a little closer to him. "Just...don't go that long again without at least taking a vacation, okay, Doc?" She scolded. "Our job is stressful enough already, and I _so _don't need you making it worse."

He frowned, puzzled; her words were stern, but her fingers were tangling in his hair and tracing little patterns on his scalp and— ooh, that felt _nice_...

"I can't just take vacations left and right like you," he pointed out, attempting to make his voice match her sternness, but it came out more like a content sigh. "There's a lot to deal with here."

"I know, but...Doc, ask yourself...what would be worse?" She hypothesized pointedly as her fingers skated lazily across his head. "Being a little behind on one of your insane schemes or stressing out completely again?"

"I'm just...naturally energetic, Shego," Drakken objected, trying to sound reasonable. "Nothing I can do."

Her fingers halted and withdrew from his head. "That wasn't 'naturally energetic'. That was the Energizer bunny times ten crossbred with a pack of starving hyenas."

"Shego!" He grunted, offended. "Could it be possible that _you're _a major stress factor for me?"

"Oh, _really_?" She teased, poking the tip of his nose with a finger. "I seem to remember you looking _pretty_ _relaxed_ a few hours ago."

"Maybe because you were using your lippy mouth for other things than being insolent," he muttered sourly.

Shego laughed. "Oh-_hoh_! Well, would you look at that. Another comeback. I better watch myself, huh?"

"Oh, for...nnnhh...just...let me sleep now, okay?" Drakken made an annoyed rumble in his throat, leaning over to turn off the lamp again.

"Okay, ya big baby," she sighed.

"Please!" He snapped.

This only caused her to poke both his cheeks with her index fingers and twist, as if making grooves for dimples. "You're so _cute_ when you _beg_," she mocked.

"Nnghnnn..."

Shego leaned over him, briefly bumping her nose against his neck before she managed to find his mouth in the dark and kissed it softly, then his cheek. "Sleep now, Doc. Nighty night."

Darn. Now he couldn't be mad at her anymore. "Night, Shego..."

Silence.

Just as Shego was about to start falling asleep again, a nagging thought wriggled itself into her unfortunately still conscious mind, and her eyes fluttered open. Frowning, she bit her lip as she mulled it over, and suddenly, she'd decided to express that thought even before she was quite sure what she wanted to say or if she wanted to say it at all.

"...Dr. D?"

There was a soft groan. "What _now_?"

_Bad idea, bad idea, __**bad**__ idea,_ her brain chanted, but the words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. "You know, if you're ever stressed out again...you could..."

He frowned; starting to pay attention in earnest. She didn't sound like she was getting ready for round three of her mocking. In fact, she sounded...serious. "Shego...?"

_Too fast, don't even know if I want—__ this is stupid, he's such a dork— shut up, don't say it__— _but still, it was as if her brain was unable to override her mouth: "But I mean, you don't _have_ to be stressed out, you could just...want...um..."

Drakken's chest swelled with surprised affection, and he swallowed hard. "Shego..." Carefully, he rolled over on his side and reached out for her with hesitation, fingertips barely brushing her arm. "I wouldn't even have to be...I mean, I could just...if you want to, I would want...all the time. No, not all the time, not like I'm some sort of— uhm, I mean, sometimes. If you want. Because I...I liked it."

He wasn't used to talking to women like this, she could tell— she _knew_, really— and he was speaking in a kind of aimless, unsure ramble, as if he was trying to figure out what to say even as he was saying it.

It was fumbling and _so_ not suave, but at the core of it was a kind of emotional honesty that was sort of...well, brave, in a way.

Brave, and intimidating.

"Yeah, it was...uh, pretty good," she said weakly.

"So, you know, just...you _do_ want to...do that again?" He hazarded.

Suddenly, she felt inexplicably giddy. "Oh, we _have_ to. It's our _duty_."

"D-duty?" Drakken stammered, his mind suddenly racing with scary possibilities, such as Shego being part of some sort of dodgy cult breeding program.

"I mean, this bed was _made_ for that sort of stuff, and I bet you've never even taken it for a test drive. It's sacrilegious. Just look at all this _room_."

"Very funny."

She rolled over, latching on to his arm and leaning her head there, grinning. "I bet you won't think it's funny when I start coming up with all sorts of interesting ways to exploit this generous space."

He pursed his lips, getting fed up with her teasing remarks. "Shego, when you lie on my arm like that, you stem the blood flow and my arm goes numb."

He'd expected her to refuse to move, or maybe even mock him...but all she did was roll over on her stomach with a soft sigh, burrowing her head in the pillow. "I need some more sleep anyway if we're actually supposed to _work_ today," she mumbled. "Now _that's_ a _joke_..."

He blinked at her, realizing she hadn't forgotten her promise. Smiling, he leaned down and kissed her hair before he collapsed back into the pillows, his brain and body finally demanding sleep again.

_**TBC.

* * *

  
**_

**Author's note:** Zoidberg threw up twice. Give him another bucket.

**Please don't leave me reviews saying 'Oh, I thought the story was done already'**** this time, okay?** I know I haven't updated in forever, but I never wrote 'The End' or marked it as complete. So remember this for future reference: _Unless a Ninnik Nishukan KP story has been marked as 'COMPLETE', it's most likely NOT complete._ Got that? Okay, good. XD

**I've**** had a bunch of half-written chapters lying around since about this time last year, and I've been very uncertain about whether I should continue this story or not for a whole year now, but as long as nobody expects very frequent updates— which probably nobody will, anyway, considering my track record— I'll be more than happy to continue. **I have to start studying again now, and I still have a full-time job, so...yeah. Thank you for understanding. D:

A lot of thanks go out to **my** **faithful beta, Charlotte C.** She beta read this chapter not only once, but twice. Once last year when I first considered continuing the story, and again this week, after I'd rewritten it and had finally decided to go ahead and publish it after all. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for reminding me of the moat. ^__^

'**U Can't Touch This':** 1990. Music hits me so hard, makes me go OH MY GAH!

**Macarena: **1995. Lalalablablabla— HEY, MACARENA! I'm willing to bet that in 2007 it was a decade, give or take a year or two, since Dr. D had last done the dirty dingo. Let's be nice and say it was closer to the end of the last millennium than the Macarena, though. XD

It was **Teh** **Yeti AKA Andy** who first suggested on the RS Net board's Villains section, in 2007, how suspiciously pimped out Drakken's bedroom looked. And it really does. How could I possibly have named this chapter anything other than _Big, Red, Round Bed_? :D


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